Total Drama World Tour: My Style
by The Noble Avenger
Summary: A new season is coming, and the 22 campers are going to meet each other once again. But things change as they are having a new host and eight Newbies to join them in an adventure around the world.
1. Chapter 1

**Summary**: A new season is coming, and the 22 campers are going to meet each other once again. But things change as they are having a new host and eight Newbies to join them in an adventure around the world.

**Pairings**: I'm not telling yet.

**Warning**: some language, cartoon violence and some other surprises

I don't own Total Drama or any of its characters, but i own my OC Sarousch Luther.

P.S.: The art style is going to be based off on that of Ben 10 and Generator Rex by Man of Action.

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><p><strong>Hello Total Drama readers, it's me, the Noble Avenger. You know, i used to be the idiot 1dvsbst, but now i'm a changed man. I just want you to know that i'm deeply sorry for my previous actions. I was cruel and childish, but now i know better.<strong>

**This story you're about to read takes place after TDA, but the Celebrity Manhunt doesn't happen, and no, Duncan doesn't win the money, as you read, you'll find out why. Some couples are broken as of canon and others will bloom in my story. You've been warned.  
><strong>

**This takes place between 2011 and 2012, and all the cast members are 19 years old. And yes, this is actually a fix fic that differs from that utter crap called Total Drama World Tour. Seriously, worst season ever. Here, i'm going to correct the wrongs caused by the stupid, mindless writers of the show and keep the characters in character, although some of them will be OOC. Again, you have been warned.  
><strong>

**And now without further ado, i present you Total... Drama... World Tour!**

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><p>Chris and Chef walked into the producer's office, again. Chris was more than nervous, or more accurately, fucking terrified of what the producer may tell him. After all, what could he have done wrong? The ratings were excellent and there was no way the producer wanted to tell him something that could possibly result in him being fired. Anything but that. Chris touched the knob and pulled it around, making a squeaky sound as the door opened. There it was, sitting in his seat, the unbiased, fair, kindhearted (obviously sarcasm) producer who scared the utter crap out of the Chris. This time, he looked like he was going to pop a vein, which meant that something was definitely off. Chris feared that he may lose his job, it was sin against nature! He'd rather die in a painful manner than losing the job that gives him privileges. Chef, however, couldn't care less. After all the hard he did for two seasons, he still didn't get his paycheck because of Chris's selfish, cheapstake tendencies.<p>

They both took a seat and listened as the producer ranted.

"Mclean, i wanted you to make these teenagers hate each other. Not making Duncan and Courtney break up in the finale. They were our cash cow and now, because of you, the ratings are plummeting. Can't you do anything right?"

"But sir" Chris nervously stammered "It's not my fault, and i'm sick of that whiny little brat trying to sue the show!"

"May i remind you that she sued the show because YOU refused to let her participate!" he snapped "Her lawsuits cost us a whole lot of money. And we received s a lot of fan complaints about how their favourites, including Cody and Noah, didn't in the season at all! We would've become richer if you only let the others participate, but no! You chose to ignore my orders" he screamed, pounding his desk with a fist, which made his lamp fall over the ground and break. Chris and Chef stepped away from the producer.

"You're the host, Mclean. I want you to make the teenagers be at each other's throats, because them being nice is boring! I want a new season and make even more money, or else you're fired!"**  
><strong>

"Actually, i have a better proposition"

All three of them heard a deep voice that none of them has ever heard of before. It was even deeper than Chef's. The host, the cook and the producer turned their heads to the opened door, and saw a tall, shadowy figure, probably the owner of that voice.

"Who the hell are you?" the producer demanded. The figure stepped out of the light to reveal himself. He was a tall man in his fifties, wearing a grey business suit with black pants and golden shoulders, indicating that he must be a general or something. He looks a little like Dr. Calico from Bolt, only without the green eye. He has long black hair tied in a ponytail, a long face similar to a mandrill's, along with a trimmed beard, a pointy nose, and average physique. But the most striking feature of his were those exotic Asian eyes, which had purple eyeliner, but had red pupils, which would resemble anyone of some demon.

"My name is Sarousch Luther" the man introduced himself in a deep, yet suave voice "and i am the new co-host according to the prescription your network sent"

"Prescription?" Chris asked dumbfounded, then it dawned to him, he fearfully turned to the producer "You're not intending to fire me, are you?"

"I am, if you don't find an idea for the new season, Mclean" he responded uncaringly.

"Actually sire, my idea is more of a plan" Sarousch said as he pulled some profiles and placed a set of sheets on the desk. "Well, there's this huge plane that opens up from the belly you see, and we can call it 'The Drop of Shame!'"

"What?" Chris asked indignant "That's MY idea, you thief!"

"Is it, Mclean?" the tall man asked rhetorically "Or just as long as our unbiased, fair, kindhearted producer believes you're still useful?"

That made Chris feel uncomfortable. Sarousch smirked as he presented the papers "You see mister, my idea for the new season is a journey around the world, and the cast members will visit every possible location on the planet"

"But that costs a lot of money, and i hate spending money" he rebutted.

"Worry not, my company, SarouschCorp will provide the extra services and conditions for the campers as soon as their teams are declared the winner. And this season and the previous one, the teams will be assorted according to their strenghts, weaknesses, personality, etc."

"Okay, i'm liking it"

"But under one condition: this season will be played under my rules, we will sent the campers a new contract that prevents them any chance of finding a loophole that would give them the chance to escape the show, like the old contract had"

"And?"

"The best part is that it will be a musical, so that the teenage population of the viewers can watch our show non stop. All of that will be possible if, you make me the new host of Total Drama"

That last part did it for Chris.

"WWWWHHAAAAAAAATT! You as the new host? No way old man, I'M the host of this show, everyone loves me!

"Ha! Not anymore, Mclean" the producer scoffed. "Now, what else do you have to offer, Mr. Luther?"

"Oh please sir, just call me Sarousch. Everyone does"

"Okay Sarousch, what other thing fo you have in this plan of yours?"

"This" he reclaimed as he pulled a profile out of the blue and placed on the producer's desk "This profile belongs to a young man who promises will bring the drama in 'Total Drama'." He said while opening the file. The producer snatched it and read it. The more he read, the more intrigued he looked.

"I don't know what to say Sarousch, but are you sure this kid will bring us the ratings?"

"But of course. He is a master manipulator and is capable of twisting delicate situations to his favor, like me. I assure you sir, this is the answer to all your problems. Not to mention that they will be joined by seven other new recruits that will take the drama off the roof"

"We have a deal" the producer immediately agreed as he shook his hand with Sarousch. Chris, on the other hand, looked like he was about to collapse.

"But, but, but, but, but," he stammered "you can't do this to me! I'm the host for three seasons! I'm the star of the show!"

"Can and will, Mclean" the producer reclaimed "You're old news now. As for you Sarousch, go and announce the contestants in the Total Drama Aftermath Studio about the new season that you will direct"

"Can do, sir" he complied as he exited the office, with Chef following suit. Chris just stood there, frozen and mouth agape about the fact that a man older than him has taken his sacred position as the host of the most celebrated TV show.

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><p>The ex-contestants in the TDA Aftermath Show studio were shocked at the tie between Duncan and Beth, who are both very annoyed at the matter, both crossing arms. Cody gasped, while Heather and LeShawna were shooting them suspecting glares As usual, Geoff and Bridgette were center stage and sharing the couch that had been placed there for them. But they looked quite worried about the situation.<p>

"What do we do now?" Geoff asked to Bridgette.

"Can somebody please tell me there is a plan here?" Duncan demanded.

"Nope! But since we're all here together one last time," Geoff said while hugging Bridgette (rather painfully on her side) with one arm before letting her go "let's party!"

"Geoff and I cut together some sweet footage of everybody from the whole season." Bridgette said while giggling.

"But what about the..." Beth and Duncan asked simultaneously before being interrupted.

"Don't get your shorts in a knot! There's plenty of time to pick a winner. Roll clip"

And so there were many clips of the second season. Then it ended and Geoff and Bridgette turned to the camera. Then it panned to Duncan and Beth, who crossed arms again and were impatiently waiting.

"Why don't you come and join us in the winner's... seat" Bridgette offered in reluctance while showing a red velvet chair, which almost looked like a royal throne.

"There's only one chair" Beth stated.

"Yup" Geoff said chuckling. The punk and the farmer walked forwards and sat at the same time, having some difficulty since it was suitable for only one person.

"You think we could at least get another seat?" Duncan said while trying to feel comfortable.

"This is the last time we're gonna see each other guys... gettin' a bit choked up here..." Geoff said in sadness.

"Aww, we've had an awesome time together... I'm gonna miss you guys." Bridgette replied.

"We'll miss you too, girl..." LeShawna said in a tender tone, before becoming annoyed "Now pick a winner so we can all go home!"

"I don't think that is going to be necessary" a mysterious deep voice was heard.

Soon, twenty two heads turned to see their sadistic host, Chris Mclean. But something was different about him, and it wasn't his hair. Rather, he looked very depressed and mopy, his sadistic grin nowhere to be found. Behind him, was a tall, grinning bearded man who was carrying a rather heavy suitcase. None of the teenagers had seen this man before, but something told them it wasn't going to be pretty.

"Hello campers" Sarousch said in a polite, cheerful tone.

"That's ex-campers to you, whoever you are." Duncan pointed out.

"Exactly, who are you?" Heather asked, suspicious of the mystery man. Sarousch laughed.

"My name is Sarousch Luther, and i have come to give you a very important announcement."

The campers dreaded the word 'announcement'. Usually, whenever Chris said that, it meant they would be forced to compete in another season. When this man said that, they were quite unsure of what to expect.

"What is that announcement? Is Chris finally retiring?" Noah asked deadpanned, although he wished it was true.

"Technically yes, Chris is putting down his hosting responsibilities, which means i take charge of the job"

"Wait, you as our host?" Gwen asked.

"Exactly, i came to inform you that you will compete in one more season"

Everyone in the resort groaned in exasperation.

"Another season?" Duncan hollored, angered "But what about my million this season. I went through a lot of kicks in the kiwis, indignity and rules from Bossy McSuepants here! Haven't i been tortured enough!"

"But why?" Courtney exclaimed in anger "What about the million? You're not going to determine a winner now?"

"No, there will be no million dollars in this season because the prize money of the following season is much better: five million dollars!"

Everyone gasped at that, five million dollars was certainly a whole lot of money. Some contestants instantly had a glint in their eyes, some pairs of eyes even turned into dollar bills.

"Besides, i told the producers that i would take over the position of host, and don't worry, i modified your contracts to make sure you have some benefits the next season. And no, there is no loophole you can easily exploit to get out of the rules; after all, a contract is a contract."

Some snapped their fingers in frustration.

"Remember, you have to wait six months until the new season airs, so until then, forget about the contest and relax. And before everyone goes, i want to show you some very special, never-seen-before clips. We think these will help our audience see the _real_ Chris McLean."

That was when Chris' eyes widened in panic.

"NO! SAROUSCH, PLEASE! HAVEN'T I BEEN TORTURED ENOUGH! PLEASE…"

But Sarousch ignored him as he pressed a button. The screen shows a video of a silhoulette of Chris in the shower. He is singing rather horribly, holding something like a microphone.

_I stand against the wall... waiting for you to ask me to dance... my heart is in your hand! Oooh, oooh, oooh!_

_Soon, a hand moves the curtain to reveal Chris naked, wearing nothing but a bath hat and holding a scrubber. He covers himself and lets out a feminine shriek._

"But that is not all, my friends" Sarousch said in a slight sadistic glee as he pushed another button to show the following clips: Chris eating a mayonaisse sandwich rather messily, sleeping with a teddy bear and sucking his thumb, him getting out of his trailer in a robe, when suddenly, a gust of wind flies by, lifting the lower part of his robe and revealing his kiwis to the world.

Everyone in the studio laughed silly about it. Chris just stood in there mortified, slack-jawed and eye twitching. His jaw was slacked and left hanging, some people thought he unhinged it.

"Now, i want you to bid farewell to your old host, because the next season you will have a new host: me"

"So long, Chris!"

"See you never!"

"And don't you dare come back!"

"You got the boot!"

"You deserve it!"

"Goodbye forever, Mclean!"

Chris only sulked and took his luggage with him, walking depressingly out of the studio and into a limo and slammed the door shut behind him. He was completely silent as the limo screeched off with a puff of exhaust and sped off into the night, towards the distant lights of the city of Toronto.

"And as an additional detail, you will be joined by eight new contestants next season" Sarousch added, obviously ignoring how much angst Chris was suffering. "And the new season will have a lot of tune, because it will be a musical season around the world!"

"So now relax children, and in six months you will join me in the new season called Total. Drama. World Tooooouuuuuuurrr!"

"Seriously?" Duncan asked indignant.

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><p><strong>Well, there you have it, folks. I hope you like it and send me reviews. Trust me, i'll do my best to make an original story and i'm already having other ideas for the challenges, as well as some of the new characters.<strong>

**I mean, we all have our own ways to create drama, and my style is not as dramatic as yours, just a bit more simple because i don't really stomach sad moments or ,make people truly evil, it's just sickening. And please Kobold Necromancer, refrain yourself from starting the Courtney/Gwen feud from TDWT, i liked their friendship, so please don't make the same mistake as the writers of the show, because i'm not making that mistake in here.  
><strong>

**One more thing: I don't really like villains who blatantly express they're evil. My villain Sarousch is far more realistic because, unlike Chris, he doesn't pride himself as the 'lord of Evil and Darkness'. Instead, he's just a selfish, uncaring human being who actually _needs_ to act politely in front of the cameras because, while Chris is often pardoned of being an asshole for being a TV star in his twenties his fangirls swoon over, Sarousch is a public figure, older than him and believes the audience expects him to act like a mature, upstanding citizen so that they would not see his true cruel nature. I'm just expressing that you should do a more subtle villain, a Bitch in Sheep's Clothing, so that the audience will be surprised of finding out that the man who pets puppies and donates charity is actually a deluded, arrogant psychopath with plans for world domination. Believe me, it makes good drama.  
><strong>

**And for all the fanfic writers, i'm going to say something against the real writers of the show: Lick my balls, you piece of shit show writers. You call TDWT a good season? Bullcrap. The fanfic writers could write better stories than that crap, and trust me, they can. I hope one day, the Elder Gods come to our world and devour you first for that shitty season. Seriously, worst season EVER.  
><strong>

So anyways, review and don't worry, this time i'm open to constructive criticism, and you can also give me more suggestions to add to the following chapters of this story, and in return, i shall acknowledge you in said chapters. It's my way of flattery.


	2. Walk Like an Egyptian, Part 1

**Summary:** A new season is coming, and the 22 campers are going to meet each other once again. But things change as they are having a new host and eight Newbies to join them in an adventure around the world.

**Pairings:** Implied Courtney/Noah/Katie triangle, possible Trent/Gwen/Tyler/Lindsay (it will be explained in due time), Harold/LeShawna, Owen/Izzy, Geoff/Bridgette, a few surprise couples.

**Warning:** some language, cartoon violence and some other surprises.

I don't own nothing, except some of the characters i created.

Well now, Happy New Year and Happy 2012 to everyone! Sorry i took this long, but i needed some originality with the first official episode. But here it is.

Aditional Note: Like Mr. Panama Red's Total Drama World Tour: The Animator's Cut, not all the places visited in the canon TDWT are going to be seen, instead some chapters are going to change and the challenges will be a bit different. Let's say he inspired me to write my story in a structure like his. And no, i'm not stealing his idea. Also, i'm not going to add DJ's curse, because, let's face, it was really stupid idea from the show's writers.

And like Kobold Necromancer, and unlike the show, the teams will not be the same as canon, rather, they will be assorted, and with a cast of 30 contestants as of now, it will vary from episode to episode.

And don't worry, i didn't steal from anyone. If you find something that you see is familiar, you can tell me and i'll be more original in the next chapter, although sometimes it's not easy to use the same words or emotion you do; but you can give me tips and i'll listen. But, 15% of what you read is what actually happened on the show, while the rest is written by me.

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><p>Six months later...<p>

"Hello everyone!" Sarousch's voice was heard as he appeared on screen with a suave smile very distintive to Chris'. He begins to make wild gestures as he speaks "Be welcome to season 3 of Total Drama. Today the world will be mine, from shining sea to shining sea. Sadly, i have to share my world with Canada's most famous group of teenagers."

"Joining me are the 22 original campers. Today they will be joined by eight newbies who will put the drama on Total Drama."

As he speaks, he gestures to the giant plane beside him "They will be travelling around the world inside this wretched abomination they dare to call an airplane. They will compete in challenges based on the culture, customs and environment of each continent on the planet. Just like the last two seasons, they will be assorted in teams based on their capabilities and starmina. In the end, only two lucky campers will win the prize of five million dollars. You heard me right, FIVE. MILLION. DOLLARS"

"So who will win? Who is going to get hurt in his/her chances on the prize? And who will make this season the most dramatic yet? You will find all these answers, and more, on this new season we dare to call Total. Drama. World Tooooouuuuuuurrr!"

*Theme song*

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><p>Sarousch stood in front of the camera as he was standing by the Total Drama Jumbo Jet "Be welcome to Season 3, my friends. Today, the 22 teenagers of Total Drama plus eight newcomers will compete in a world trip. First, we shall greet the originals. And here they are!"<p>

A blue and white house arrives and stops in front of Sarousch.

"Now i would like you to give an applause to your Canadian idols, who are once again back to the big screen! Courtney. Duncan. Heather. Gwen. LeShawna"

The five aforementioned campers stepped out of the bus and began walking as they looked at the camera, and either smiled or waved. While they were walking, Heather came to a stop, so as to make Gwen clash in her back.

"Are there reserved seats? I mean, can I have one not behind Heather's pony hair ponytail?" the goth complained, while the rich girl sneered.

"Um, my extensions are human hair!"

"You learn something new every day." Duncan snarked while smirking. Gwen giggled and exchanged some looks with Duncan. Courtney could only fume and glare.

"Lindsay!" Sarousch announced as the beautiful blonde stepped out, blowing a kiss to the camera. Trent stepped out next, carrying his faithful guitar.

"And Trent, your favourite musician, is back in the game once again"

Trent walked next to the others, and then spotted Gwen. He flashed her a crooked smile, hoping desperately that she would at least smile back. He had no such luck, as she quickly looked down at the ground unhappily. He was then disturbed by a loud noise.

"Ah, mommy!"

Owen was struggling to stay on the bus, being pushed off by DJ, the only one strong enough to handle the very large teenager. Once he had been successfully pushed off, he had to be pulled away as he tried to get back on the bus.

"No, i can't be on that plane!" the poor fat boy screamed looking for an excuse "I have a medical condition, i have a date with the dentist, i get dizzy spells!"

"Owen, calm down," DJ said trying his best to tranquilize his friend "It's not going to be so bad, i mean, what's the worst that could happen?

"You had to jinx it, didn't you?" Noah's sarcastic voice was heard as he stepped out of the bus next, with an annoyed look. Next to him, Katie and Sadie came out, squealing as usual.

"OMG Sadie, i can't believe we're going to be together for another season!" Katie exclaimed.

"I know Katie. Maybe i can finally get a boyfriend this season! Sadie agreed.

"I'm serious, man! I can't be on that horrible plane! I have planeophobia!" Owen continued to scream.

"Aerophobia." Harold corrected as he got out of the bus "From the Latin, as opposed aeronausiphobia, the fear of flying sickness."

"Keep up the fascinating facts and I'm gonna be aero-nauseous all over you." Noah said in annoyance at the taller geek. Ezekiel was the next to step out, wearing his Z bling.

"I think this season is going to be for me, eh? Where's the plane?"

"I know, right? Let's fly!" Izzy exclaimed as she also got out of the bus and jumped on Ezekiel's shoulders. He shouted, waving her arms frantically.

"Whoa! Watch out!" he screamed as he lost his balance completely, and Izzy was pitched forward as he fell back. Sarousch looked at the scene in hidden amusement.

"As you can see, Izzy is back, as well as the mysoginistic homeschooled boy, Ezekiel"

Tyler came out next, and posed a winning position and tried to do an athletic hop, but predictably enough, he ended up falling.

"There is also another fan favourite, Tyler, and the TD Aftermath show host and hostess, Geoff and Bridgette!"

Said couple stepped out of the bus, making out as usual. Neither could see the ground and both fell on top of Izzy, Tyler and Ezekiel, forming quite a big pile.

"Whose hand is that?" Bridgette's muffled voice was heard as she felt something against her breast. That something was Ezekiel's hand, who quickly took it away.

"Sorry, my bad!" Zeke exclaimed sheepishly. Izzy cackled.

"Getting a little frisky aren't we Zeke?" Izzy asked slyly. Ezekiel could only blush. He soon looked terrified when Eva stepped out.

"That's something i'd expect from a pig like you" the buff girl said as she stepped out and began walking, not caring that she was walking over the fallen contestants. Gwen soon walked towards them and held her hand to help Tyler.

"Are you feeling okay, Ty?"

"Trust me, it was less painful than when your brother held me from the ramp and gave an 'encouraging' push."

"I know Tyler, you have balance problems related to your hearing, that's why you often fall"

"Wait, how does Tyler know that?" Trent, intervining, asked bemused. "And how do you know that about him? You two barely talked the past two seasons"

"Actually, we spent quite some time together three months ago"

"What?"

"Well Trent, you know that i told you my mother is dating again?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, turns out the man she is dating is, uh-"

"That the man turned out to be my father" Tyler concluded. **(1)**

The others exploded in a plethora of questions, laughs, and congratulations. Trent, on the other hand, simply didn't know what to respond. His face was completely blank. He turned to Gwen with a 'How is it i didn't know about this?' look. The goth actually felt ashamed about it, after all, it's been six months since they broke up, and didn't have the guts to tell him that Tyler is going to be her step-brother.

"And here's Justin along with the surprizingly popular Cody!"

Justin stepped out of the bus, looking dashing and handsome as usual. Cody stepped out and give the rock on sign.

"And finally, Beth"

The farm girl stepped out of the bus.

"Hi Betty!" Lindsay screeched joyfully.

"Hey Linds!"

The two friends ran up towards each other and gave a hug.

"And now prepare to welcome the newbies of Total Drama. The first contestant is a top honor student hailing from Deustchland, Germany, whose father is a wealthy baron and has the uncanny ability to charm any living creature out of its pants. Albert!"

A second bus arrived, containing the new contestants. The first new contestant is a very tall young man. He was somewhat scrawny, although not as much as Noah or Harold. He had black, spiky hair gelled backwards, olive green eyes just like Bridgette's along with a monocle and a charming smile. He was wearing a classical black longcoat that reached to his knees, a crimson neckerchief, a pair of brown gloves and shoes, and a golden chained clock hanging from his pocket.

"Hallo, dear friends," he spoke in a fine German accent before looking down "Perhaps i could assist you, Fraüleins" he said while helping Bridgette and Izzy up. They both looked in awe at the skinny, yet charming young man.

"Wow," Bridgette said before blushing and stuttering "I-I-I- I have a b-b-boyfriend!"

Albert then saw the fallen males "Perhaps you could use some assistance too, comrades"

He offered a them a hand and helped them up.

"Wow" Ezekiel and Geoff said, but the party boy quickly hid what he said.

"I like boobies, dude!" Geoff exclaimed, not realizing what he just said. Albert ignored the partygoer and homeschooled farmer, and smirked to himself as he got out of the bus. The camera panned to Sarousch.

"And now it's time to welcome the second Newbie of Total Drama. He comes from a long line of military officers, whose father is a Navy Admiral of the Royal Canadian military, and a mother who is a lawyer and diplomat. This is Leo! **(2)**"

The next contestant was also male, but his physical structure was very different to Albert's. Instead, he was a tall, buff, tanned young man who looked the part. He looked like Xander, except his raven hair was shorter and almonst military-like. He wore a plain black T shirt, olive green army pants and a belt around his waist that said 'Cocky'. Lastly, he was wearing a chain with some medals around his neck. He scanned the contestants with his brown eyes and his competition. Some of the contestants were looking nervously at how deadly and serious he looked. Now this was one guy not to take lightly.

"Wow, he sure looks tough" Cody whispered to Noah, who couldn't help but feel intimated by the new camper. Leo was standing in front of him and looked tranquil yet peeved. Everything felt silent. His eyes dared the next one to say anything about him.

"Um, hey" Cody said nervously, but Leo silenced him.

"Don't waste your breath soldier, you are in war zone now. So watch your own back, because i will show no mercy"

"Yes sir" the techno geek replied, scared.

"Now greet the next new contestant. He comes from a dynasty of warriors in the Gaelic Ireland, a skilled archer and is part of an animal community shelter. He especially likes wolves. Welcome Faolan!"

Crickets chirping was heard. Sarousch looked at the contestants, who looked confused. He sighed.

"That's Gaelic for 'little wolf'" he informed.

"Oh" everyone exclaimed in understandment.

The third contestant came out, another male. He had short dark brown hair and, strangely enough, had white bangs on his forehead. He looked like Sachiel Kof, but with a different outfit. He was wearing a navy blue jacket, underneath a black T-shirt and black pants. He was also wearing cowboy boots and had a wolf medallion in his neck. He also had navy blue eyes. All the girls immediately began drooling over him, while guys looked with envy, especially Justin, who felt himself outmatched by this new pretty boy, as well as Tyler, Harold, Geoff and Owen, who were all having trouble holding their girlfriends.

"Anything to say about the show, Faolan?"

"Not really, i just wanted to be further from home" was all the mysterious teen said before walking up and blending with the others.

"The next contestant is a boy who comes from California and, to put it honestly, would give Cody and Harold a run for their money in the bad luck department."

"Hey!" both nerds screamed indignantly. Duncan just laughed.

"Here is Charlie!"

The next arrival was another boy, and he looked pretty... normal. He was a short, scrawny teenage boy who looked like Chris Thorndyke from Sonic X. He had Caucasian skin, light brown eyes and brown hair. He was wearing blue jeans, a black long-sleeved shirt, which was underneath a red and white T-shirt and brown shoes.

"Hiya, fellas" he said before accidentally tripping on the edge of the bus and falling face-first. Many of the contestants flinched, except Leo and Faolan. The new boy slowly got up and began dusting himself.

"Man, just ten seconds in, and i'm already feeling bad luck." he grumbled.

"Don't worry Charlie, your doctor called me and gave your list of conditions. There is nothing to fear but fear itself. Franklin D. Roosevelt said that" Sarousch said.

"Thank goodness" Charlie muttered.

"Now it's time to receive the new girls, and trust, they are quite a lot to look at. The first girl is a girl who would make Heather and even Lindsay look hideous"

"WHAT!" Both girls screamed indignant. Sarousch just shrugged.

"What? I'm saying it for the job. She's also the president of a Total Drama fanclub, works in an animal shelter, helps the poor, etc etc, all those meaningless actions of lower importance. Here is Susan!"

The next contestant was a girl, and ho boy, was she really beautiful. She had long brown hair reaching to her waist, blue eyes that were as clear as the ocean, and pink lipstick. She was wearing a plain, pink sleeveless tank top, blue shorts that looked like Bridgette's, pink tennis shoes and a multicolored bracelet on her right wrist. She had a very beautiful hourglass figure, with long legs, wide hips and was rather, um, "big" on the chest area, which would make even Lindsay look like a fencepost. It was nonetheless modest.

Sarousch made a beeline towards the pretty girl.

"Now Susan, i will have you know that you were chosen solely based on your looks"

"That's not what i expected when i read the contract"

"Sorry, those are the rules and you have to follow them"

While they were speaking, most of the guys were already drooling upon seeing Susan. Charlie was staring at her legs, whose shorts reached her knees. Duncan stared at her heart shaped earrings (much to Courtney's disgust, and jealousy), while Geoff was mesmerized by her blue eyes. Bridgette, feeling jealous, grabbed her boyfriend's ear and pulled him away, earning a yelp of pain.

As for Cody, well, he was having trouble not to stare at the girl's huge bosom. He tried thinking rationally instead of with his pants. And failing miserably.

"Don't stare, don't stare, don't stare" he inwardly chastised, pounding himself on the head, before summing up the courage to look up. That is, until he saw Susan right in front of him. She was waving shyly, at him!

"Um, hi" she said sheepishly, with a clear blush on her face. Feeling nervous and not knowing what to do next, Cody simply waved her back.

"Girl, why are you red like a tomato?" LeShawna asked. "Especially near string-bean here"

"You could say I'm one of Cody's fans." Susan replied.

The large chorus of "aww's" made both Susan and Cody blush very red. Albert made a beeline towards her.

"Well, i for one feel humbled to see such a ravishing beauty upon our feet" he said with charm while taking her hand "Would you do us the honor to impress us with your unique talents, my dear?" he asked while kissing her hand, for about twenty seconds before letting go. Susan awkwardly rubbed her hand.

"Um, thank you, i think?" Susan replied.

"Aw, how sweet!" Lindsay cooed.

"He's like a total gentleman" Bridgette gushed. Her boyfriend, however, wasn't entirely convinced.

"He's cool, but not that cool" he said while crossing his arms. Bridgette glared at him.

"Geoff, could you please show some respect? He is showing manners"

Leo also wasn't entirely convinced of Albert's demeanor, even though the contest has barely began "_There's something suspicious about that German boy. I better keep an eye on him_" he thought.

Sarousch let out a chuckle "My my, aren't they spunky. Now i present you the sixth newbie. She is a girl from the neighborhoods of the always sunny California, whose mother is a famous fashion designer. She was also taught about fashion by the legendary fashionista Patricia Field. This is Nikita."**(4)**

The next contestant was also a girl. She was African-American, with long blonde hair that reached to her waist. She also had brown eyes that looked relaxed. She was wearing an orange tube top and a cream-colored shirt over the top. She was wearing large earrings on each ear, a lot of make up and also blue jeans, as well as leopard-painted heels.

"Whassup, Nikita is in da house!" the girl exclaimed, speaking the same way as LeShawna.

"Now now, reserve the energy for the contest" Sarousch said.

"Well, you betcha, 'cause this sis' is going all the way to the top!"

"Not if i have anything to say about it" LeShawna muttered under the breath.

"The next arrival is yet another girl. She comes from a family of lawyers and businessmen, but sees herself as, as some people put it, a 'humanitarian'"

"What does that mean? Is it a new brand of fashion?" Lindsay asked excited, even though she knew nothing of the word 'humanitarian'. Courtney, who was nearby Lindsay, rolled her eyes.

"No Lindsay, a humanitarian is someone whose ethics consist on kindness, benevolence and sympathy in an universal and impartial way to all of humanity"

"Yeah, and you're definitely the poster child of that notion" Noah said sarcastically. This made the CIT glare at the bookworm.

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"I'd tell ya, but i like having my head attached to my shoulders, thank you" he responded, still sounding like he didn't give a damn. A cough was heard, and the three turned to see Sarousch, who was looking a little irritared.

"Could i please continue? And no more interruptions. Anyway, she is a honor roll student waiting to hace access to the Empire State University, and hoping to spread the message of love and comprehension to all of mankind. Here is Elisa"

The next arrival was yet another girl, who looks like Gwen Stacy of the Spectacular Spiderman cartoon but with a pencil skirt. She is a middle sized young woman with a very petite figure. She had short, curly blonde hair and blue eyes behind her big, round glasses.

Sarousch held a hand to help her down, and she accepted.

"Thank you" she said in what appeared to be a British accent.

"And the last arrival is someone who previously sent a home message as well as an audition to join the show. I would introduce you to her, but i suppose she could do it herself. Here is Jasmine!"

"Oh no, not her" LeShawna muttered, slapping her forehead.

The next contestant could be heard before seen, as Jasmine was letting out loud cheers before the bus had even pulled up all the way. The actress leapt out, holding onto her beret with one hand so as not to lose it.

"I'm here," she cried out. "I'm actually here on Total Drama! This is a dream come true!"

She then noticed LeShawna. She screamed with glee and ran up to hug her voluptuous friend.

"OMG! OMG! OMG! LeShawna, i'm SO glad to be here with you!"

"Same here" the big sista sarcastically said. Then Jasmine noticed Harold nearby before grumbling "Oh, he's here, isn't he?"

"Yeah, and i expect you to treat him well"

"Don't count on it" Jasmine said, lifting her nose up at the geek "What do you see in that creep anyways?"

"Now now girl," Nikita said, playing peacemaker "Let's not do something ya'll regret. Save it for the contest"

"And now that everyone is here," Sarousch's voice was heard as the contestants turned to see him "I would like to announce you that this will be a season all over the world. In each country we travel to, the challenges will be based on the culture, language and traditions of said countries. For the winners there will be some rewards while the losers send someone away. And those luxuries will be found in this marvel i like to call 'The Total Drama Jumbo Jet!"

And with that, there was a loud chugging, interrupted every now and then by clunking, as well as the sounds of an engine that was already dying. They looked up as the Jet approached. Smoke shot out from the engine, bolts fell loose, and it sputtered and choked as it approached. The only difference was the fact that the large orange image on the side of the Jet, originally of the first host, was now replaced by Sarousch's own image, complete with a pilot's outfit.

"Excuse me, but I'd like to express some concern about the safety of our plane." Courtney said.

"Trust me, darling. My top priority is security, but unfortunately i must follow orders. No need to be concerned, it's perfectly safe!"

As soon as he said that, a part of the jet falls, and a raccoon runs out of it. This freaked Owen out.

"All boarding!"

"No! I can't ride in that thing! Call the United Nations, call a cab, call my Mom! No, I'm not doing this, I'm out! This is unethical!"

While Owen was ranting, Sarousch, with an annoyed look on his face, signaled Chef with a hand. Chef complied and handed him a rather large rifle. Sarousch pulled what seemed to be sleeping serum and put it on the weapon. Cocking the weapon for preparation, he calmly walked towards Owen off screen and shot him in the butt.

"Mommy" Owen's drowsy voice was heard as he fell to the ground, snoring. He was now sporting a dart on his butt. Sarousch blew the smoke out of the rifle. He then eyed the contestants threateningly, which managed to scare even Eva and Duncan.

"Anyone else has something he or she might need to add?" he asked, his voice now devoid of any emotion. Pan to the contestants looking in fear. "Anyone?" A cricket's chirping was heard again. DJ simply coughed.

"No? Good! Now boarding on a voyage to five million big ones! We're saving you a first class seat for all the action! Right here on Total! Drama! _(sings)_ Woooorld Tour!

"Seriously?" Duncan asked in indignant disbelief.

* * *

><p><strong>(Total Drama Jumbo Jet, Dining Room)<strong>

Everyone was inside of the plane, especifically the dining area where Sarousch was explaining how the contest would go.

"Singing? _Really?_" Gwen asked indignant "I thought Sarousch was joking about that!"

"Gwen, i thought you liked how i sang" Trent said, hoping to have a smile out of her. This only made her turn away.

"Well, I don't have a problem with it." Courtney said.

"Me neither!" Jasmine said while hopping.

"Yeah, 'cause you _like_ singing!" LeShawna added.

"Well, i ain't gonna do it!" Duncan exclaimed.

"Why are you doing this to us!" Heather demanded.

"Singing reality shows are very popular around America. And as i was informed, the worse the singing, the higher the ratings, which is why on this show there will be no vocal couches, or rehearsals, or even warnings!"

Everyone started complaining about that condition. but Sarousch raised a hand to shut them up.

"You have to," the host said, smirking. "The rules are, when the sound of the musical chime goes off, you all have to break into song!"

"I won't! Girls sing. Little birdies sing. Ha-ha. Duncans do _not_ sing." Duncan said angrily.

"Well, i'm afraid to tell you Duncan, that your contract states that if you don't sing, you face immediate elimination." Sarousch reminded the punk.

"Need i remind you that as winner of Total Drama Action, i'm allowed any perk on the show? In this case, i want you to forbid singing of any kind. No musicals, no singing, no dancing, none of that crap!"

"Well, well, you sure are clever to be a low criminal. But also very foolish, since your new contract doesn't have the same loophole like the old one had, which stated that if you won a season of Total Drama, you would be allowed any perk you wanted. But since you techincally didn't win Total Drama Action, you are forbidden from that benefit, as well as the prize money. And consider this: if you quit this season, you will suffer the same shame as Ezekiel when he was the first vote-off, and i can always turn it into instant elimination. Just imagine what your 'homies' in Juvenile Hall will think of you, as a coward and a loser with no future" Sarousch warned, which made Ezekiel uncomfortable. Duncan looked in shock about the possibility of his 'homies' in Juvie mocking him about being the first vote off this season, not to mention that he was left penniless by being once again tricked into participating again now that the million is worthless compared to the new prize. That was a humilliation he refused to take. He only grumbled as he stepped away.

"That's better" the new host said, satisfied. He turned to the other contestants. "Over here is the economics class. This is where the losing teams must stay until they win the next challenge."

The contestants looked around. There weren't any seats in the economy class, just a long bench on each side with seat belts against the wall. Baggage holders were above the "seats," but they were broken and jostled. Some rotting suitcases sat up there, rats living in them. A leak was coming from the ceiling, though no one knew how that was possible, since it wasn't even raining outside.

"That does NOT look comfortable!" Heather exclaimed.

"No comfort for losers." Sarousch said off screen as the others turned to him. "There are safety harnesses, and an emergency exit, but no comfort in here, or there."

"I need to use the little girl's room. Where is it?" LeShawna asked.

"There is one, in-between this compartment and the economy class."

"Good, cause I gotta make a deposit!"

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**LeShawna**: (She walks into the bathroom, which has faded graffiti and grime on the walls. She starts to unfasten her pants when she realizes something about the mirror, and quickly fastens them again.) Here's a camera in the potty... AGAIN? UGGH! Can't a sister get a little privacy on this program?

* * *

><p><strong>(Total Drama Jumbo Jet, First Class)<strong>

"Also, unlike the two previous seasons, you will be in assorted teams based on your abilities, starmina, intelligence and category" Sarousch explained as he guided the contestants through the first class.

"As another added twist, the winning team should get something more than immunity, and while we have assorted teams I figured the one who places first would get more than the runner-up." By this point, Sarousch was standing in front of a door. "I present, first class."

It was clean, contained well-spaced out seats, had a big snack bar, and flight attendants were walking around, seeming like they can be personal assistants to the winners. The seats were plush, the corridor was carpeted, there was a bar loaded with soft drinks and bottled water, and the baggage compartment wasn't crap at all.

Duncan let out a whistle "Well, now this is accomodation"

"I'll say" Charlie added "The first class is always classy"

"Impressive. Really" Albert complimented as he approached Lindsay and Bridgette "I suppose these accomodations are the right ones for such pretty ladies."

Bridgette and Lindsay giggled and blushed, while Elisa merely rolled her eyes, although she was smiling. She looked at Albert.

"Well, German boy, i assure you that for every high mountain you climb, you will eventually fall"

"But what if that mountain i'd want to climb was you, my dear?" he asked, with a voice as smooth as honey. Meanwhile, Tyler, Geoff and DJ were looking in envy.

"That guy's smooth as mama's gravy!" DJ said referring to Albert.

"Dude, this ain't right," Tyler complained. "Lindsay was going out with me."

"I get your pain, dude" Geoff said while wrapping an arm around the jock to comfort him "Bridge is also spending much time with the new boy. I just hope she doesn't leave me for him. She wouldn't do that, would she?"

DJ laughed "Sorry to disappoint you guys, but no one can compete with gravy!" This statement made both the jock and the party animal glare at the quarterback, who winced in response. Leo and Faolan approached the group, and immediately were bombarded by Jasmine, Katie, Sadie and Izzy.

"Hey there handsome"

"Wow, look at those pectorals"

"Yeah, but look at that hair"

"Sorry ladies, but Izzy is the one who will have a threesome"

That last statement made everything silent. They all looked at the crazy redhead, who tilted her head about their stares. Leo and Faolan simply ignored them and walked past where Albert was talking with the other girls. He approached the two of them.

"Well, it would seem that we will be comrades this season, don't you think" he said extending his hand. Leo and Faolan raised an eyebrow at the German teen.

"Sorry, i don't associate myself with freaks, psychos or smarmy fancypants" Faolan spat before walking away. Albert scowled and put both fists on his hips.

"He sure is a likeable individual" he commented sarcastically. Leo only nodded.

"It's like they say, there's one in every family. I suppose it's only a matter of time before we get to know him better"

"Somehow, i doubt that"

Heather, sitting in one of the comfy chairs, glared at the two boys who could possibly mean trouble for her.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplaine cockpit<strong>

**Heather:** I can see right through those guys! You know this extra confessional is a thousand times nicer than talking in the toilet!

**Chef:** Maybe for you, I'm trying to prep for a flight here.

**Heather:** Hello? Venting! (she shushes Chef) Anyway, the new guy is so transparent, sooo fake, sooo-

**Chef:** Deliciously seductive?

**Heather:** That is exactly the opposite of what I was trying to say!

**Chef:** Pretty good looking guy, to boot, for a scrawny weakling, and the other could well put some generals proud. I'm just sayin'!

**Heather** (frustrated): Ugh! Forget this!

* * *

><p>Courtney, Cody, Noah, Bridgette, Geoff, Harold, Trent and Gwen were inspecting the first class area thoroughly. Courtney's curiosity was peaked when she came across the door that led further up into the plane. She looked in, and she and the others were awed by what they saw.<p>

"Wow," she said, looking around, her wonder causing her to narrate what she saw. "Where are we now? A gold-plated jacuzzi..."

"A grand piano..." Trent added.

"a log-burning stove..." Noah added.

"Is that an antique desk? With a high-tech computer?" Bridgette asked.

"How do i win this!" Harold asked as Sarousch approached him.

"I would love a hot tub" Bridgette added, thinking about swimming in that jacuzzi.

"You don't," Sarousch said, "these would be my accommodations."

"Yours?"

"Yes, they were going to be for Chris, but i wasn't going to allow that idiotic egomaniac spend all of the show's budget in his own needs. So, technically, this belongs to me now, which means they're off limits to you."

"You mean to tell me that the budget of this show bought you a gold-plated jacuzzi," Gwen hollored in disbelief "but you couldn't get a stable, more durable plane instead of this piece of junk?"

"My dear, i said i would spend the budget on the contestants' daily conditions, not on this plane. You should be thankful that i'm granting you better conditions than Chris gave you for the past two seasons. And besides, i'm just following orders from the unbiased, fair, kindhearted producer. You should understand"

He then turned to leave, but not before adding "Also, i built this room with my company's budget, thank you. Now, follow me."

Sarousch moved over to a place with some tiki decorations and a set of benchers. It looked somewhat like something out of Survivor.

"And lastly, this is where we will have our elimantion ceremonies. if you don't receive a barf bag full of airline-issue peanuts, you'll be forced to take the Drop of Shame. You all will vote for who you want to go by stamping a passport of your least favorite teammate. You all will do the votes inside either of the two confessionals on our plane. Don't worry, these will be in complete secrecy. All eliminations are final. Now, any questions?"

Ezekiel raised his hand "Yeah, I got a peanut allergy, eh... or more like a sensitivity."

"Well, too bad for you Ezekiel, you will receive the peanut if you're not voted off, whether you're allergic, or not. Besides, you, like the other contestants, have signed liability waivers in case of any accident. But remember, our show does not hold itself responsible for any physical accident or emotional trauma you may go through"

* * *

><p>Time past by, and the plane was up in the air. The contestants all sat in the cafeteria of the café, all pondering what the future held. There was barely any talking. DJ seemed most distraught, however. He kept glancing out the window, and sighing heavily. "Seems every minute, I can feel us getting further and further away from home. And further away from Momma!"<p>

"Um, exuse me?" Susan asked as she stood in front of the girls side of the table "Mind if i join you?"

Cody nodded. "Sure thing, take a seat"

Susan did so and sat between Lindsay and Courtney. "Wow, aren't you excited about this. I get to be on a plane and visit the world. I hope we land on Italy, that's my favourite country."

"I know right?" Cody said as he nodded, his long brown bangs flapping on his pale forehead. "You say that you're a fan of mine, so tell me, what do you know about me?"

"Well, where to start... First of all, i know that you have a huge collection of every video game ever played, including God of War, Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Space Dead, Resident Evil, Devil May Cry, and when you were twelve, you used to play Bubble Dragon"

Some heads turned to Cody, who was feeling rather unnerving.

"Wait, Bubble Dragon? That game for ten year olds?" Noah inquired, trying to hide his amusement through a cynical smile.

"Don't blame me! I could never get to level 57!"

This made Susan giggle "You're so cute when you stutter, and blush"

Cody chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of his head "Well, i was going through a phase"

The sound of a bell ringing is heard, and the contestants turned to see Sarousch entering, wearing a fancy suit and a bowler hat, along with a cane that looked like it came out of a musical.

"Whenever you hear that friendly little bell, it's time for a musical number! So, let's hear it."

"But, what are we supposed to sing?" Courtney asked.

"You have to make it up as you go. Wouldn't be challenging otherwise now, would it. Now, you better sing or suffer a five feet long fall from the Drop of Shame."

The Courtney smiled and got up.

**Courtney:** _Up!_  
><strong>Courtney and Izzy:<strong> _Up!_  
><strong>Courtney, Izzy, and Bridgette:<strong> _Up!_  
><strong>Courtney, Izzy, Bridgette, and Lindsay:<strong> _Up!_  
><strong>Harold:<strong> _Sing!_  
><strong>Harold and Cody:<strong> _Sing!_  
><strong>Harold, Cody, and DJ:<strong> _Sing!_  
><strong>Harold, Cody, DJ, and Tyler:<strong> _Sing!_  
><em>We're flying.<em>  
><em>And singing.<em>  
><em>We're flying and we're singing!<em>

"_It's Flying Time! In our good prime!_" Susan sang as she carried Cody on a food cart. **(4)**

"_Dancing in a plane is not a crime!_" Susan, Cody, Lindsay and Bridgette sang.

"_I wonder where we will go first_" Geoff sang.

"_I hope it's not anywhere cursed_" DJ sang.

_"We've got a lot 'o crazy tunes to bust!_" Izzy sang.

"_It's a pleasure, and an honor, and a must._" Albert sang in front of the ladies, earning him giggles from them. He smirks slyly at the camera.

"Dudes, this is messed. You're singing in a plane." Duncan said without singing.

_"What did you expect? Sarousch is freaking insane._" Harold sang.

"Yeah, but, guys, you're singing on TV!" Gwen added.

"_Haven't you always wanted to? It can't just be me!_" Courtney sang while skipping merrily.

**Everyone:**

"_It's Flying Time! In our good prime!_"

"_Dancing in a plane is not a crime!_"

"_The entire world we're going to see_"

"_How awesome you think that could be_"

**Harold:**

**F, F-L, F-L-Y-I-N-G**

**F, F-L, F-L-Y-I-N-G**

_Inside a plane we're going,_

_I wonder what we'll be doing_

_We're traveling everywhere_

_And to me it's a pleasure_

"_Paris has always been my cup of tea_" Lindsay sang.

"_Well personally i prefer Haiti_" Noah sang

"_I can't hope to be in a Broadway_ _play_" Courtney and Jasmine sang together.

"_That's a lot of what i have to say_" Heather sang.

"_Germany is a country with much pride_" Albert sang smiling.

"_Sorry pal, but we'll let that slide_" Leo sang, shaking his head.

"_There's many things i wanted to do_" Ezekiel sang.

"_If we get hurt, Sarousch is getting sued_" Eva sang.

**Everyone:**

"_It's Flying Time! In our good prime!_"

"_Dancing in a plane is not a crime!_"

**Gwen:**

"_Well i refuse to go home_"

"_So i may as well bear my doom_"

"_Well i think this whole thing sucks_" Duncan sang mockingly.

**Everyone:** YEAH!

"Attention all flyers! Enough singing! Strap yourselves in; we are now beginning our descent into Egypt." It was Chef's voice over the intercom. He then began to mumble to himself, not realizing he had forgotten to turn the PA off. "Musical numbers... worst idea ever. Sarousch is such an idiot."

Sarousch didn't like that remark. Not one bit. Uf there was something Sarousch hated was that people questioned his intelligence, and anyone who had the balls to call him stupid was in for a world of pain, like Chef would be in a moment.

"Hey, why's the PA light still on... ? Oh sh-" the cook quickly turned it off.

"Excuse me one moment" Sarousch before departing and walking towards the door. What was heard next was the sound of punches and girly screams. The teenagers cringed a bit as the sound of the punches became unbearable to hear.

An abrupt crash followed as everyone was thrown out in the middle of a desert. Most all of the teenagers were feeling the heat already.

"Welcome to Egypt!" The contestants looked to see Sarousch standing in front of them, dressed in a Pharoh outfit. Chef was alongside him, covered in bandages and sporting a black eye. With an intern holding a fan behind him, the new host was grinning as he held up a small gong and a hammer. "Contestants? Are you ready?"

"An eleven hour flight, Chef's in-flight cuisine, a forced musical number, and now we got a challenge" LeShawna ranted while rolling her eyes, complaining and glaring at the new host.

"Don't you love this heat?"

"It's like we're being cooked in a giant oven" Harold said while sweating and looking tired, as he shaped a hat out of the tin foil he had. "I just hope anyone else has more aluminium."

"It would help if you wouldn't dress up like a giant baked potato" LeShawna said

"Aluminium foil means the aliens can't read your brain. That's a real problem in this area." Harold stated.

"Harold, aliens don't exist, and besides, compared to the talking yetis, running ducks, Wooly Beavers and pterodactyl geese on this show, aliens look perfectly normal" Noah said.

"Does anyone have any sunscreen?" Katie asked. "We could, like, get so seriously burned!"

"Can we get some water?" Heather exclaimed. "Dehydration is a serious case in a desert!"

Sarousch waved them off.

"That is why you have to leave those needs aside in order to become stronger. After all, this challenge is to put your survival skills to the test. It is to determine who the strongest one is. As Charles Darwin said, only the strong survive while the weak perish. It's all about the natural selection"

"That's not what he said" Noah protested.

"Yeah, what Charles Darwin actually said is-" Harold began explaining before a glare from the host shut him up.

"Do you want me to show you how the elimination works the hard way?"

Both boys stopped when they realized trying to debate Sarousch's logic was foolhardy, and would end up risking themselves to the new host's wrath. With Chris, they knew how to turn the tables on him, but this new man was a whole new game. This left the host satisfied, then he held the gong up.

"It's your funeral. Set. GO!"

Sarousch clashed the gong with the hammer in Ezekiel's face, causing him to flinch as everybody else ran. Inside of the pyramid, the group (consisting of Owen, DJ, Harold, Noah, Trent, Katie, Sadie, Heather, Leo, Faolan, LeShawna and Izzy) finds out there are three distinct paths, each of which had a different Egyptian symbol. The first door had an Egyptian hieroglyphic, the second door had a scarab symbol, and the third one had a mummy signal.

"Oh great, our friendly neighborhood host dude failed to mention there were different paths" Noah said sarcastically.

"The only thing you need is to use your instinct" Leo suggested as he went to the door with the scarab symbol. "Follow me"

"Fine by me" Faolan said as he followed Leo.

"He said this was a maze." Heather stated, quickly choosing the middle path. Susan soon followed her, along with Elisa and Eva, who simply shrugged at each other, as well as Cody.

"I know! Okay, I saw this in a spy movie once. You lick your finger and hold it up to find the air flow!" Izzy exclaimed as she licked her right index finger, and then held it in the air "Mmmm! The sand really crunches in your teeth. Fun! Okay, DJ, give me your hand" she said extending her hand, but LeShawna interfered.

"Don't do it DJ! You might get a case of crazy!" the big sista warned, looking simultaneously at DJ and Izzy "Come on Harold"

The lanky geek follows her, and DJ does the same, leaving the former Gophers alone with the twins.

"Oh oh oh, let's take the scary mummy door!" Izzy exclaimed pointing at the passage with the mummy symbol.

* * *

><p>Courtney was on her way, yet hadn't made it there. She ran up just in time to see the first group go down the middle and the other in the right. Courtney took the left path. She walked in a long hallway that seemed not to end. Glancing at the writings inscripted in the walls, and some of the vases used to collect dead remains. Like in the plane, Courtney's curiosity was peaked when she came across a door that led further up into the inside of the pyramid. She looked in, and her eyes went wide as saucers at what she was witnessing.<p>

In the insides of the pyramid, there were excavation machines pulling dirt from the ground, driven by people who appear to be workers wearing protective suits. Armored men stood atop the sandhills with large guns, indicating that they were protecting the machines. Courtney wanted to know what was happening, but she knew that she'd get caught if they saw her, so she hid behind a big rock and observed afar.

"Report" Courtney heard a gruffy voice speaking. She narrowed her eyes for a better look, and saw that the voice belonged to a gruff-looking man in his mid-forties/fifties. He was wearing a construction suit and was handling a large piece of paper, probably a map. A younger man came to him.

"Well sir, the operation has gone a 62% in and we are advancing a little. But the object has yet to be found"

"That's okay, kid. That's all i need to hear. Call the boss and inform him that we are close to extracting what he seeks"

"But sir, what is it that Mr. Sarousch is looking for in here? He hasn't informed us anything about what the project concerned. We've been doing this for weeks now. Yet we haven't found anything closer to the tomb. Why still doing this?"

"Right now, i don't know and it's not my business. As long as Mr. Sarousch is giving our paychecks, we're more than happy to extract what he wants out of this dirt"

Courtney had a little problem processing this. Did Sarousch hire these people to excavate in an ancient monument which was by the way being currently used for a challenge? But what could they be extracting from there, and why? And more importantly, it surely would be illegal to operate in a monument without authorized permission from the locals. She sat and tried to make any sense out of this, but unfortunately, her butt landed on some sharp pebbles, which surely hurt. She screamed a little, but quickly covered her mouth. Sadly, due to the place being so under the ground, her little shriek echoed across, and this made the people below notice her from afar.

"Hey, who's that in there? one guard asked pointing to where Courtney was standing.

_'oh crap'_ she thought.

"What's that girl doing in here?"

"Hey this is a top secret operation! Get out of here! Guards!" the foreman ordered at the armored men, who cocked their weapons in preparation and aimed at where Courtney was. Realizing she was caught, she tried to run away, while evading the bullets and running away.

"Folllow her! Leave no witnesses!"

* * *

><p>Outside the pyramid, Tyler, Lindsay, Geoff and Bridgette were standing in front of the entrance to the building.<p>

"Is it too late to go under instead?" Tyler asked while looking.

"Albert's doing okay. He's like, the super cutest mountain goat in the world!"

Lindsay said as she watched the German teen hopping and climbing like a mountain goat, with such grace and finesse. He then turned around and hopped back down until he met the trio, and smiled at the two blond ladies.

"May I be of assistance?" Albert offered, extending his hand. "I know it would be wrong to leave two angelical beauties like you in the middle of this infernal weather. And i'm feeling pretty lonely, so would you grant me the honor to accompany me on top of the pyramid?" he talked while wiggling one eyebrow, with a finesse very similar to that of Dr. Facilier: like honey.

_'Now all i have to do is to wait for these two idiots to be overtaken by their hormones_' he thought while grinning evilly on the inside '_then i will choose which of these Frauleins shall be my future queen'_.

Lindsay burst into a fit of giggles and accepted his hand. Bridgette was blushing a little, but took a look at her boyfriend Geoff, who looked a little upset, like he was about to burst into tears.

"Wait, Albert! How about we take Geoff too?"

"Hmmm, i don't know..."

"Please?" she pleaded with the cutest puppy dog eyes she could muster. Geoff soon half-smiled. Albert was no fool, however, and quickly devised a plan about how to deal with the blonde couple later.

"Very well, but only because a four man group is stronger, no offense to you ladies. Now shall we?"

Albert started going up, with the two eager blondes following him, while Geoff started to slowly walk, feeling somewhat depressed that his favorite girl wasn't spending any time with him. But he wasn't the only one.

"Wait! I can be a goat!" Tyler exclaimed in desperation. He tried to jump up but stopped himself before his grand takeoff. "Oh forget it, it's not worth it."

He rushed up to the side and began walking in frustration. Then, he heard some grunts, and looked up to see Gwen struggling hard to climb the pyramid. She grinded her teeth as the rough stone seemed to scrape away her palms.

"You need a hand?"

Gwen looked up to see Tyler extending his hand out.

"How did you get this far without falling?" she asked.

"It wasn't easy. I suppose you could need some help"

"Thanks Tyler, but i just need to move a little higher"

"Maybe i can help. That's what a guy does for his future stepsister."

"Shouldn't you be with your blonde girlfriend?"

"She'd rather be with Albert than with me" he replied in sadness "I just don't get it. Previously, it was the jocks and bad boys the girls would fawn over, and now, this scrawny dude comes and steals Lindsay away!" he exclaimed, before pausing for a moment, then sighing. "I guess we're simply not meant for each other"

"What do you mean Ty? You are a jock, she's a cheerleader blonde, you do the math"

"I know, but i guess the problem is that we were based on hormones back then, like Bridgette and Geoff."

"Speaking of which, how is Bridgette with Geoff?"

"Oh, she's also smitten by Albert, and Geoff is taking it real bad. I know this will sound cliché, but what do they see in him? As in, what does the new boy has that i don't?"

Gwen began thinking for a moment, and then remembered how bad her break uo was because Trent began acting concerned for her since last season. The reason their relationship failed was because Trent was scared that he wasn't good enough for her, and tried to throw the challenges on the set so that she would win and he thought she would be grateful. But sadly, that only put her off, and their break up made everything go downhill. Then, Gwen gave one glance at Albert and saw that unlike Trent or Cody, who would try anything to win her heart and ended up looking desperate, the German teen looked confident, calm and a total gentleman who barely needed to do anything to reach a woman's heart; all he needed was to say some sweets nothings and the ladies were all over him.

"Well Tyler, sometimes girls prefer gentlemen over athletes. It's a matter of taste"

"I can act like a gentleman, but only if i get enough motivation"

Gwen smiled "You're perfect in your own clumsy way. Just don't let this get to you, she'll remember you soon"

"I hope so"

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Gwen:** I know this is going to sound very cheesy if you ask me, but Tyler is actually such a nice guy for being a jock. I mean, the jocks from my school are insensitive, arrogant Neanderthals who go for shallow girls. But Tyler seems to be very nice and is questioning his own relationship. What kind of girl wouldn't want a guy like that? Not that i want to date him, of course, because he's going to be my stepbrother; otherwise, it would be like incest. And that's wrong.

**Tyler:** Gwen is very comprehensive because she understands what i'm going through. I tried to make Lindsay remember my name and face, but i haven't been successful so far. And that german jerk is taking advantage of my mistake. I have to prove to her that i'm worth it.

**Albert:** The poor excuse of a jock is trying so hard to make his beloved remember him, and yet, she forgets him every five minutes! (he laughs) That would give me the right chance to use her to my advantage, because i seriously doubt there is any intelligence in that pretty head of hers.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Leo was running in the path as Faolan, LeShawna, DJ and Harold were trying to catch up with him. Suddenly, DJ stopped and turned around to see a display of mummified animals.<p>

"That's a real dog! Poor little guy." he said in sorrow.

"DJ! We do not have time to cry over a stuffed dog!" LeShawna exclaimed impatiently.

"Hey there, little buddy. Wish I had a biscuit to give 'ya." DJ cooed as he reached his left hand to pet the mummified dog, but Leo slapped it away, making the gentle giant flinch and rub his hand.

"Don't even think about it soldier! When they tell you not to touch anything, that means you do NOT touch anything. Understood?"

DJ made no response, feeling nervous.

"UNDERSTOOD!" the soldier hollored, making DJ do the salute.

"Sir, yes sir!"

"Good. Now let's keep moving! We have a challenge to win!"

* * *

><p>Noah, Trent, Owen, Katie, Sadie and Izzy went down their own path, until Izzy caught something of her interest.<p>

"Oh, look! We're in the nurse's office."

"It's a pyramid, not a high school" Noah snarked.

"Costume party! Mummy me!" Izzy exclaimed as she picked a few bandages and then threw them at the three boys, who caught them in their hands.

"You two take care of that, please." Noah said as he gave Trent his bandages "I will lead the Wonder Twins to the exit sign"

He then turned to Katie and Sadie "Well, follow me"

* * *

><p>Outside the pyramid, the group of Albert, Bridgette, Lindsay and Geoff arrived on top of the pyramid. As for Tyler and Gwen, the jock was helping his future stepsister climb the structure, while struggling himself to go up.<p>

"Almost there" he wheezed as he reached his hand to grab Gwen's, but he ended up dropping it out of tiredom. Unfortunately, he had the bad luck to touch a scorpion, which in reaction, stung its tail sting in Tyler's hand, much to his agony. Tyler grabbed his own hand in pain, but lost his grip, and came crashing down, sand billowing around him.

Gwen looked in horror and tried to go down to help him. But a large hand grabbed her shoulder and she turned to see someone you would never want by your side.

Duncan.

"Watcha doing, Pasty?" the punk said with a smirk.

"Oh, Tyler was helping me up, and now he's falling down" Gwen said sounding concerned.

"Happens all the time, i mean, he's a klutzy idiot" he said casually.

"Don't call him that! And shouldn't you be with Courtney?"

"Nah, i decided Crazy in Training wasn't worth it. Good thing i dumped her sorry ass. Besides, i'm feeling alone and i just wondered if you'd come downhill with me"

"I don't know, i have to help Tyler down there"

"Chill out, there's no worries, like they say 'Hakuna Matuta', or some shit like that. You coming?"

The goth took a moment to consider the offer. She just hoped that Courtney didn't assume again that Gwen would get her 'goth hooks' on Duncan again. But then again, Courtney pretty much broke up with him after he voted her off last season, and yet she still acts like he is her property. Talk about hipocrisy and obsessive greed.

"Okay, i'll do it, i mean, what's the worst that could happen?"

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Courtney continued running for her life from the crazed guards. In her rush, she unknowingly stepped on a secret trap. A small chunk of the pyramid started to shift and formed what looked like a mini-elevator, which dropped down. Courtney wasted no time in entering and getting the elevator to work.<p>

* * *

><p>Sarousch was waiting for the contestants to get out. He yawned as the intern filled his cup of tropical juice, which he began drinking, placing his feet on the back of another intern, who was sitting on four.<p>

Suddenly, something rang, and Sarousch figured it was his cellphone. He picked it up and spoke.

"Hello, who is it?"

"Mr. Sarousch, sir, it's me, Corman. I'm calling to tell you that there are good news and bad news."

"What are the good news?" The host asked, until he noticed the intern looking at him. He placed a hand on the speaker, glaring at the intern.

"Do you mind? This is a private talk, so get out. You too!" he screamed at the two interns, who quickly ran out. Sarousch unblocked his cellphone.

"You were saying?"

"Oh yeah, you see, we're this close to digging out the tomb you requested us to excavate. It'll only take a few more days"

"How many?"

"Um, like three more days, i think"

"No matter, it's all the time i need" Sarousch calmly replied "And what are the bad news?"

"Well, there was an intrusion while we were working, and we think she is a spy sent to uncover the operation"

"A she? How did she look like?"

"We didn't get to see her, but some of our elite guards informed us that she was young, had mocha skin and brown hair"

_'Must be Courtney, i should've known'_ Sarousch thought bitterly as he knew that the CIT would report this to the authorities and put the show under investigation. He would make sure to blackmail her into silence later. On the bright side, though, he knew that without any concrete evidence, Courtney would be dismissed as a lunatic.

"Don't worry about that, i will take care of the problem. I thank you for informing me. Sarousch out"

"Roger that"

Ans with that, Sarousch flipped the cellphone shut.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Heather and Susan were walking down the corridor, making some idly chat. Or more accurately, Heather was doing the talk. More specifically, trying to coerce the new girl into an alliance.<p>

"So i was thinking, since you are new in this show, perhaps i should explain you the rules. That is if you agree to be friends with me" Heather suggested in a sickening sweet tone of voice, as in trying to convince Susan. However, the buxom chick wasn't buying it.

"I don't have to know the rules of how to deal with you, Heather" Susan said matter-of-factly. "You've been labeled as the villainess of Total Drama, and they give you a lot of nicknames like Queen Bee, Queen of Mean, Alpha Bitch-"

"Okay, okay, i get it!" Heather said while mumbling "Is it just wrong of me to think straight in the game?"

"You hurt a lot of people back in Season 1, Heather," Elisa said as she glanced at the rich girl "Most of your schemes were out of a petty grudge against Gwen, and they could be classified as an assault to human decency because of your selfish desires for fame and victory. It's just plain disgusting"

"Yeah, and i was voted off the island because of you!" Eva hollored, making Heather flinch "I would have gotten further if you hadn't STOLEN MY MP3!"

"And to add insult to injury," Cody decided to add his two cents "i found that the reason the bear attacked me for the chips was because YOU threw those chips and i ended bandaged up because of YOU!"

"Alright, so i did a few bad things, but it was 100.000 dollars! Anyone would have done the same" Heather rebutted, trying to justify her actions. While she was ranting, though, she stepped on another trap.

The walls opened up in a few gaps and from someplace within these gaps arrows began shooting all around.

"DODGE!"

The girls and Cody inclined and tried to prevent the arrows from hitting them. Heather got up and walked towards the arrow-covered wall and picked one arrow, beginning to analyze it. To her horror, there was some thick dark purple liquid _stuff_ dripping from the tip. "Guys, be very careful! These things are poisonous!"

"Everyone run!" Elisa screamed as they went to the corridor. Heather, on the other hand, was having a little difficulty, mainly due to wearing heels.

Heather shouted, "Wait! I don't run properly in heels! Slow down! HEELS, DAMN IT, HEELS!"

"WELL, TOO BAD!" Eva screamed back. Soon, they were toppled by some extra weight coming from above, making the girls (and Cody) collapse as the heavy object fell on them. That heavy object turned out to be Sadie.

"Woopsies, my bad" she said nervously. The girls (and Cody) got up and turned to the big BFFFL.

"How did you get in here?" Elisa asked.

"Well, it's kinda a funny story" Sadie asked while awkwardly rubbing the back of her head.

_Flashback_

_"OMG, isn't this, like, amazing?"_

_"Oh yay, i'm more than sure it its"_

_"And Noah is, like, so nice at taking us to the exit!"_

_"I know, i wish i could have someone so nice to me!"_

_"Like that military guy Leo? He sure is very handsome"_

_"I know, but that Faolan guy is soooooo bishie!"_

_"I know!"_

_Both girls squealed, much to Noah's consternation. Right now, he was pondering if it was a good idea to leave with the twins rather than staying with his former Gopher partners. Then again, considering that most of them don't trust him due to his inaction in season 1, and since Izzy went down a new level of crazy, Noah decided to take the lesser of two evils and try to mantain his sanity intact. And failing._

_However, the two girls were so caught talking about boys that they didn't notice a small chunk that Sadie unknowingly stepped on. This caused a secret door to open below and Sadie fell right into it. Both girls screamed; Sadie because of the fall and Katie because she was going to lose her best friend._

_"SAAAAADDIIIIIEEEE!"_

_"KATIIIIIIIEEEEE!"_

_End of Flashback_

"And that's pretty much it, guys" Sadie concluded.

"Well, no matter about that, we still need to get out of here!" Heather declared.

"But where to and how? This place is a labyrinth. For all we know, we could be in last place." Elisa said.

"We're still winning this" Eva declared while pounding a fist in her palm.

* * *

><p>Ezekiel was still wandering around in some unknown path. Ezekiel turned back. "Is someone following me?" He whispered to himself. "Guys? Anybody?" He then noticed an object resembling an intercom in the wall.<p>

"An intercom? What the?"

He pressed it, causing a trapdoor in the ceiling to open, which drops a pile of bandages and several ancient Egyptian artifacts, which fall down on him as he looked up. Ezekiel was weighed down by the bandages, and limped off. The weight of the bandages weighed him down after several minutes of dragging himself, and he was soon breathing heavy.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, Trent and Owen were looking for Izzy, who disappeared while wandering around the pyramid disguised as a mummy. So far, they had no luck.<p>

"Izzy? Izzy!"

"Dude, she's lost. We gotta go" Trent said.

"Oh, poor Iz!" Owen sobbed.

"Poor Iz? She kept insisting on going in circles because she smelled something lucky"

"Ah, that may have been my fault" Owen said while laughing nervously. Then, he farted, much to Trent's chagrin.

"Dude, gross!"

"Airplaine food"

* * *

><p>Soon, Leo, DJ, Harold, LeShawna and Faolan got out of the pyramid and ran up to the finish line on the other end of the desert where Sarousch was awaiting them. Soon they were gasping for air while trying to stand still.<p>

"Good work"

"We're first!" DJ exclaimed in joy.

"Attention, everyone who can hear me," he announced, "we have our first winners: Leshawna, DJ, Leo, Faolan and Harold! Go stand behind the number 1"

"In Egyptian it's wiʻyaw" Harold informed.

This ony made the bearded host glare at the nerd, who decided to shut up. Soon then, Jasmine and Nikita ran out of the pyramid screaming, up to the finish line. They were soon gasping for air.

"Girls, what happened?" Leo asked.

"So horrible! There were SOOOOO many beetles!" Jasmine said panting.

"Those sure sure are nasty!" Nikita added.

"Technically, they're called scarabs" Harold informed, but the actress just glared.

"Who cares, nerdling"

Beth then walked out of the pyramid next and, upon seeing the others on the finish line, she quickly caught up.

"Did i miss something? I kinda got lost after being chased by some mummy"

The new team members exchanged looks of confusion, then turned to the female nerd.

"Mummy?" DJ asked.

* * *

><p>Inside the pyramid, Heather, Cody, Susan and Elisa were running for their lives from a creature so horrible, so unspeakable, so mind-breaking, gut-wrenchingly demonic that mere words couldn't describe its pure evilness.<p>

Izzy disguised as a mummy.

"Guys, guys, guys! How about another musical number?"

_A pyramid is just a triangle with room inside. _

_I would be awesome as Frankenstein's bride._

Eva just grumbled while placing a palm over her face about how her friend is reachign new levels of ridiculous. Sadie walked lightly while sobbing about how she missed Katie (which almost drove Eva nuts).

* * *

><p>Lindsay peeked over and lightly tapped one of the steps leading down. Instantly, the pyramid shook violently from the small tap. The four of them stood in disbelief and wondered how they would get down. Then, when Bridgette saw a stop sign, she got an idea.<p>

I know what to do," she said cheerfully as she was pulling the stop sign that was haging from the pyramid's roof, with her hands. With a mighty tug, she yanked the piece of metal out of the stone.

"We can surf down on this!" she exclaimed. "We can all fit on it and it'll be the fastest way down! I'll steer and you two can hold onto me!"

"Such a wonderful idea, Blondine." Albert complimented with suave endeavor "Now i see the reason why i chose you to be in my team."

He failed to notice Geoff looking mildly enraged, even if the party boy was already digging daggers behind the german's skull.

Bridgette giggled and blushed, flattered and somewhat embarrassed at her teammate's compliment. However, this didn't let her notice that, while shaking her head, she ended moving the stop sign and, even though Geoff managed to evade it at time, she accidentally hit Lindsay with it, sending the pretty blonde screaming down below.

"Lindsay! I'm so sorry!"

But soon, another small chunk of the pyramid started to shift and formed what looked like a mini-elevator, which dropped down. Soon, the pretty blonde was packed into a small set of bricked arranged into a rectangular shape: a one-way mini-elevator.

* * *

><p>"Oh God, it was, like, so awful," Katie wailed.<p>

"Now now, there's nothing to fear Katie" Noah said as comfortingly as he could while Katie clung by his arm. "When we get out of this place, you will soon see Sadie again"

During Noah's guidance towards the exit, the twins were talking non-stop about things they liked, and quite frankly almost drove Noah insane. That is, until Sadie stepped on another chunk that opened a trap from below and sent the large girl down below. Katie had been outright sobbing, and Noah decided to give her a shoulder to cry on. Now his shoulder was very wet with her tears, and she had calmed down to the point of not sobbing outright.

"But, but, it's just that I don't know what could have happened to Sadie! I mean, what if she gets hurt? Or ends up dead, or worse!"

She began crying again, while Noah patted her back and massaged her hair.

"Shh, everything will be fine, trust me"

They continued walking in the corridor, with Noah trying to give her courage. But when Courtney caught up to them...

Neither of them looking where they were going, they bumped heads and Noah fell.

Courtney just had to ask. "What were you doing?"

"Oh nothing, i just collided with a glory-seeking madwoman while trying to console baby doll here" Noah said, ever sarcastic, while jerking his thumb towards Katie. Courtney ignored him and started to walk on before some rumbling started.

"Another earthquake?" Courtney asked, stopping in her tracks. Suddenly, a part of the walls shift open as Lindsay fell out, making a pile with the other three present.

It took a while for Noah to realize where he was, and when he did he turned a bright red. One hand ended up down Lindsay's shirt, another on Courtney's butt and Katie was right on top of him with her chest close by his face. The four quickly got up, all red, and almost all rubbing the back of their heads.

"Let's never speak of this incident again" Noah suggested.

"I know, it was an accident" Courtney calmly took on hand and placed it down.

* * *

><p>"Hey, I found Izzy!" Trent exclaimed as he saw a figure covered in bandages. But something was wrong, for this figure looked nothing like Izzy's womanly body.<p>

"Oh Iz! Hey, you do make a cute mummy" the big guy said as he approached 'Izzy' "Gimme a kiss, you adorable mummy!"

The figure tried to shout out, but the bandages muffled his voice. Owen grabbed its shoulders and puckered up, while the mystery person reached up with heavily bandaged arms, shoving at his shoulders.

Trent stared unbelievably for a few seconds, then his eyes widened the size of saucers when he realized something: the muffled and masculine voice that was unlike Izzy's. His entire body froze up, and then he panicked.

"That's not Izzy! RUUUUUUUUNNNNN!"

* * *

><p>Bridgette, Geoff and Albert went down the pyramid, with Bridgette riding the sign as if it were a surfboard. Geoff was trying to get the emotion of a lifetime, but instead, his screams of joy were more like terrified shrieks. Albert was clinging to Bridgette's waist in an attempt to maintain balance. The sign slided down until near the finish line. The three quickly got up, and Geoff and Bridgette started celebrating.<p>

"Whohoo! Yeah, we did it babe!"

"After you" Albert said as Bridgette went to the line, but Geoff saw him suspiciously before pointing at his own eyes, then pointing at the educated German. Albert shrugged it off and started walking towards the line, but Sarousch held a hand.

"Not so fast, dear boy. This season we have three teams. Bridgette and Geoff were spurned out and landed before you Albert, so the lovely couple will be part of the first group. Albert, you are the first person of team 2"

"In Egyptian, it's síntay" Harold informed.

"If it's any consolation, you do get:" the host said while showing Albert his teammates:

Tyler came crashing down the pyramid, into the sand. He was buried up to his waist, upside-down, at the end of his painful fall.

Trent and Owen came sprinting out of the pyramid, screaming in terror and pale. Both were desperately trying to catch their breath as they ran past the young gentleman and the older host. Owen whimpered as he placed his hands on his knees for balance. Trent collapsed in the sand, staring up at the sky. Izzy came out next, still wrapped in bandages and still acting like a mummy. She was followed by Noah, Courtney, Lindsay and Katie.

"That is my team?"

Justin came out next, complaining about how the sand is rubbing against his pectorals.

"Congratulations" the host said.

"That's... wonderful!" Albert said with a smile that seemed forced.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplaine Bathroom<strong>

**Albert** (furious): How idiotic! *swears in German* Of all the incompetent- *swears in German*

* * *

><p>"Hey!" Cody broke one of the few actual conversations amongst the group, but for a good reason. He pointed down the corridor, at a small bit of light. "The exit!"<p>

Cody and Susan were the next to leave, followed by Eva, Heather, Elisa and a tearing Sadie. They all ran up to the finish line, where they began celebrating.

"We did it! Group hug everyone!" Susan screamed in joy as she wrapped her arms around Cody, not realizing (or maybe she did) that she placed his head between her very large breasts. Cody felt himself burning, although he was grinning like a doofus.

_'Now i can die happy_' was what the pervert boy was thinking. As for Sadie, she wasted no time in running up to her friend and preparing to hug her. Katie saw her and did the same. The song "Chariots of Fire' was heard as the two BFFFLs were running in joy, both with their arms extended and smiling in utter joy. Sadly, as they were about to hug, Sarousch came in between the two, as the song soon began warping.

"Sorry Sadie, but you came after Katie's team did, so you have to locate with your group"

"What!" both girls screamed, beginning to cry "Can i still be teammates with Katie and start our own team"

"No, all decisions are final. Go with your group, now" the host said in a strict tone of voice. The larger girl tearfully complied and walked slowly to where her team was.

"Heather, Susan, Cody, Eva, Sadie and Elisa, you will form Team 3"

"In Egyptian-" Harold began, but Sarousch shut him up.

"Shut up, Harold!"

Cody looked everywhere and noted something.

"Where is Gwen?"

He got his answer when he and his team looked up at the top of the pyramid, where Duncan and Gwen were standing.

"Duncan, we need to go down there, everyone is already in teams"

"No worries, pasty. I'll handle this"

"ATTENTION!" Sarousch screamed through a megaphone as the bell chimed. "Recognise that sound? The race is not finished yet, and i think it's time for a little musical reprise!"

"You said ONE song for episode! " Duncan angrily said.

"Yes, and this is a reprise, not a song! If you don't sing, you're out! Not let's hear it!"

"You know what? No." Duncan screamed as he stepped down the pyramid, with Gwen following him "No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Three hours on this stupid pyramid in this stupid heat, and you want me to sing? FORGET IT!"

"It's in your contract" Sarousch said irritated at the stubborn punk.

"Eat it then, goat-face! If you need me, I'll be in the plane waiting for a ride home 'cause I'm out. Done. I quit!" Duncan screamed and then departed to the plane.

"You are nothing but a sore loser with no future, Duncan. Then don't go on saying it was my fault that your 'homies' will be mocking you!"

Gwen looked at Duncan departing and looked a little sad. She didn't notice a hand approaching her.

"Need a hand? Looks like we're teammates" Cody said.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Cody:** You won't believe my luck. I'm stuck with the goth i've always dreamed of, a sexy vixen who is my biggest fan, and so many hot girls. Even though having Zeke and that Charlie dude isn't bad. After all, you know what they say, bros before hoes. But i guess having Eva and Heather on the team could be a trouble, what with Heather giving orders to everyone, and Eva having serious anger issues. But still, being in a team full of girls is sweet. Life is good.

**Gwen:** I'm stuck in a team with the girl i hate, the helpless boy who has a crush on me, the hot-tempered Eva, a girl who claims to be Cody's fan, the half of Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Idiot, and a girls who claims to be a humanitarian. I just hope that things don't get any worse. (Her eyes widen) No wait! I jinxed it.

* * *

><p>Charlie was the next to get out, screaming and waving his arms like crazy as he was being chased by the same figure that Trent and Owen encountered, much to their horror.<p>

"Charlie no!" Owen shrieked as he covered his eyes and Noah and Trent hid behind him.

"You're carrying the undead!" Noah screamed while pointing out.

"I know that!" Charlie snapped "Just get it away from me!"

The mummy struggled out and managed to raise one of his arms and ripped the bandages from his face. It was Ezekiel all along, who gasped, breathing fresh air.

"Thanks for all the help, you knobs." Ezekiel sarcastically said as he ran up to the finish line.

"Ezekiel, Gwen and Charlie, you will join team 3" Sarousch announced, much to the girls' chagrin, who began complaining.

"What? The weird goth girl, The Gwen-obsessed pervert, the unlucky guy and the sexist farmer? Are you kidding me?" Heather ranted.

"I don't want them in here neither!" Eva exclaimed as she glared at the three boys, who flinched and winced under her glare.

"I just want to be with Katie!" Sadie wailed.

"Rules are rules. No complaining"

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Gwen:** It's official: God fucking hates me.

* * *

><p>Soon, everyone lined up in circle form to listen to what Sarousch would announce next.<p>

"Now decide which the names of your teams will be. You have three minutes, while i enjoy this cup of iced tea" Sarousch told while holding a cup full of ice tea in his right hand, as if he were tauntingly waving it in front of the thirsty contestants. Jerk.

"Team Victory!" Leo, Harold, Geoff, DJ, Faolan, LeShawna, Beth, Bridgette, Jasmine and Nikita exclaimed as the symbol of a golden trophy appeared on screen.

"Team Amazon!" Heather, Gwen, Susan, Sadie and Elisa exclaimed while Eva made both Ezekiel and Charlie shut up and Susan hugged Cody. Then, the female gender symbol appeared on screen.

Team 3, on the other hand, were heavily debating which name their team could use. Until Owen came up with something.

"How about Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool" the fat oaf suggested as the symbol of Sarousch's mug appeared on screen.

"Owen, i seriously doubt that is going to make Sarousch-" Noah started saying, but the host interrupted.

"The team name stays. I'm not one to brag, but i usually see myself as a role model for many generations. You can keep the name, Team I'm Really, Really, Really, Really Cool. Now we have a special item for each of the contestants arriving," Sarousch said, "and it will benefit you on your trip to the Nile, and across it. Or maybe it will be a real disadvantage."

He snapped his fingers. A few interns came out, two of them leading an old camel on a leash, and one almost being walked by a very excited goat.

"Team Amazon, you receive the camel"

"Team I'm Really, Really, Really, Really Cool, you get the goat." he said as the goat ran up to the team and headbutted Tyler in the stomach, making him fall.

"And Team Victory, you get a stick"

"So the guys who come in last get a camel and we get a stick?"

"Everything will be explained, when i feel like it" Sarousch replied, then he turned to the camera "Next time on Total. Drama. World Toooooouuurrrr!"

* * *

><p>There goes part one the first episode.<p>

Now i'm giving information about the new characters:

**Albert:** He is more or less based on Gideon Gordon Graves, only less geeky and wearing a black longcoat, while at the same time looks like Dr. Kisaragi of RahXephon, but with his hair gelled backwards. His Chessmaster attitude is also based on other well known schemers, namely Lelouch and Azula, although trust me, he would make them look like amateurs. His hidden attitude, meanwhile, resembles Muruta Azrael in terms of being racist, arrogant and spiteful. I'm also making him voiced by Robin Atkin Downes, referring to his role as The Doctor in Team Fortress II, a charismatic yet power hungry young chessmaster hailing from Germany. In general, he is a younger version of Amon Goeth.

**Leo:** Personally, i see him as an Expy of Sousuke Sagara, because they are both highly trained young men who understand every combat move and military strategy. Unlike Sousuke, however, Leo actually has parents and is more social than Sousuke, not to mention less explosive-prone. His military attitude would make even R. Lee Ermey look like a pussy.

**Faolan:** Aside from looking like Sachiel Kof, his attitude is more similar to Hawkeye, in that he is a cynical archer, and has some traits from Beowulf himself. He is also a probable Expy of Ragna the Bloodedge, due to the Badass attitude and anti social behavior.

**Charlie:** Phisically, he looks like Hiccup from How to Train your Dragon, only without the gap in his teeth (that characteristic is for Cody only). His clothes are similar to Chris Thorndyke from Sonic X. Overall, he is an Expy of other unlucky dudes in Anime, more specifically Shinji Ikari, Tenchi Masaki, Keiichi Morisato, Ataru from Usurei Yatsura, Keitaro Urashima, you name it.

**Susan:** She looks a little like Ariel from The Little Mermaid, but with brunette hair. But her moe personality is more based on Miruku Asashina, Milfeulle from Galaxy Angel, Hinata Hyuga, etc. In short, she's an Expy of Amy, a character of Enigma Dragon Warrior, but with a little more spunk, like Chidori Kaname. She's also based on 8Liana8, a Deviantart accountant who is a Cody fangirl. As for her body, she's not exactly an exaggerated example of giant boobs, rather, her body is based on Sora No Otoshimono's Mitsuki Sohara, Girls Bravo's Kirie Kojima, Kemeko Deluxe's Izumi and Iketeru Futari's Yuki Umemiya, brunettes who are known for having very big Gag Boobs. In case you don't know about them, you can search in Google.

**Nikita:** Besides the obvious hint below, she is also based off on Camille Leon of Kim Possible, except she's not evil. Moreover, her personality is based on Monique's, another Kim Possible character. Also, her taste in fashion is based off on Sonoko Suzuki, as well as Vanessa from Gossip Girl.

**Elisa:** Her appearance is very similar to Yukari Tsukino of Ai Kora, but has the hair of Fuu of Magic Knight Rayearth, and the outfit worn by Gwen Stacy of the Spectacular Spiderman cartoon. Her name, besides from being an allusion to Queen Elizabeth I, is more of a reference to real life human rights activist Elisabeth Omilami and Elizabeth Hirschboeck.

**(1)** I took it from Total Drama Comeback Tv Tropes' WMG page, which included the possibility of Gwen's mother dating Tyler's father. I know it will sound cliché and too similar to Bridgette and Trent's situation, but i will eventually tell you the reason why as the story advances. Also, considering Tyler's true mother is a bitch, maybe this change is for the better.

**(2)** Leo is a character created by Deviantart artist Cid-Vicious. I don't own Leo, but i'm putting him here because i thought it would be great to give Heather a better match up than Alejandro, and make his future rivalry with Albert a male counterpart to LeShawna and Heather. (Oops, a spoiler).

**(3)** Nikita, aside from being based on Camille Leon, is an Expy of Enigma Dragon Warrior's character Jazz.

**(4)** Jasmine is a character on the TDI show. Like Kobold Necromancer, i'm adding her here because, well, why not. Sadly, i'm not that good with over dramatic characters like Jasmine, but i'll do my best.

**(5)** The continuation of the song is more based on Looney Tunes Show's song "Be Polite". At first, it begins with how it began on the real show, but it eventually devolves into this song.

I know i didn't write much of Faolan, Charlie, Nikita, Trent or even Leo, but i assure you that the next chapter tension will heat up (pun intended).

And i know that Gwen is acting a little out of character in some confessionals, but i'll have you know that it's how they're edited out by the host to make them look bad.

One more thing, i'm not trying to sexualize Susan in any other way. I'm just giving her the same role as Belle of Beauty and the Beast, in that she is intelligent and down-to-earth, but is constantly judged by her looks and only her looks. She oughts to prove them wrong.


	3. Walk Like an Egyptian, Part 2

**Summary:** A new season is coming, and the 22 campers are going to meet each other once again. But things change as they are having a new host and eight Newbies to join them in an adventure around the world.

**Pairings:** Courtney/Noah/Katie triangle, Trent/Gwen/Tyler/Lindsay square (possibly), Harold/LeShawna, Geoff/Bridgette, Owen/Izzy, Cody/Susan, possible Leo/Heather.

**Warning:** some language, cartoon violence and some other surprises

I don't own nothing, except some of the characters i created.

I'm so sorry i delayed, it's just that i had a terrible time trying to think about the basket weaving scene and how to make it work. But here it is. I hope i did a good job.

Aditional Note: Like Mr. Panama Red's Total Drama World Tour: The Animator's Cut, not all the places visited in the canon TDWT are going to be seen, instead some chapters are going to change and the challenges will be a bit different. Let's say he inspired me to write my story in a structure like his. And no, i'm not stealing his idea, because i'll come up with different countries than him. Also, i'm not going to add DJ's curse, because, let's face, it was really stupid idea from the show's writers.

* * *

><p>Let's take a few moments to review some of the features of our aircraft. Safety is our number one priority, so please, remain seated with your seat belts fastened at all times. The plane has one exit, located here. As we explore exotic destinations, take time to familiarize yourself with the local architecture. The world is our playground. But remember, refusal to sing will lead to immediate disqualification. When dividing into teams, be sure to give your crew a catchy handle. Upon arrival at our final destination, one lucky competitor will receive a parting gift to remember.<em> Five million dollars<em>! So stoll that carry-on baggage and lock those tray tables in the upright position! We're taking off for one _crazy_ ride! Welcome to Total! Drama! _(singing)_ Woooooorld Tooooour!

* * *

><p>(Opening Theme)<p>

Several spotlights and cameras appear out of nowhere, kicking a raccoon from the jet's engine, and then from a suitcase, finishing with a clapperboard clamping down. The camera then rushes through the Total Drama Jumbo Jet's first class and through the cockpit, past Chef Hatchet while Sarousch Luther jumps out of the way.

_Dear Mom and Dad I'm doin' fine,_

After flying over the CN Tower, the camera leans down and drops from the sky, passing by a familiar island and landing in a familiar lake.

_You guys are on my mind._

Owen is seen underwater, smiling at a fish. The smile then turns into an embarrassed look as he realizes that he has lost his swimming trunks_. _Above the water, Charlie reels the swimsuit with a fishing rod. He is on a raft along with Noah, Courtney, Katie and Lindsay, looks at what he catches, shakes his head, and casts the swimsuit away.

_You asked me what I wanted to be_

Noah is seen paddling on a basket canoe alongside Lindsay, Katie and Courtney, who are all arguing. Noah gives an annoyed look, but soon looks in terror as alligators beging swimming around them, leaping into the air repeatedly as they paddle by.

_And now i think the answer is plain to see,  
><em>

The canoe then paddles off-screen and the screen briefly shakes, implying a crash. The camera pans over and shows that the canoe had crashed into an orange inflatable raft, which Duncan is standing on. Duncan gives Noah a glare before his raft starts to sink.

_I wanna be famous._

Noah sees the delinquent sink and sighs in relief. He then turns around to glare at the three girls, who all smile sheepishly. The camera then goes up to the sun, with a bright flash transitioning from this scene to the top of the Statue of Liberty.

_I wanna live close to the sun,_

Leo is helping Heather onto a beam, smirking flirtingly while doing so. Heather simply glares at him. Nearby, Albert is looking at them intently. Then Tyler runs past them with Cody in a baby carriage, until Albert trips him. This causes Cody's carriage to roll right over to the edge, where it crashes into a sign, sending Cody flying out of the carriage, off the statue, and into the Yukon, where he falls into Susan's arms.

_Go pack your bags, 'cause I've already won,_

Susan seems pleased and hugs Cody into her cleavage, while Cody seems very content.

_Everything to prove, nothing in my way_

A couple feet behind them is Ezekiel, using a map to try and figure out his way home. However, he then notices a polar bear, and drops the map, running off in fear.

_I'll get there one day._

The polar bear removes its mask to reveal Izzy, who laughs at her prank, before she is attacked by an angry baby seal, which bites her on the arm, causing her to run off in panic.

_'Cause, I wanna be famous!_

Elsewhere, in the ocean, DJ and Bridgette are surfing, with Bridgette doing so nonchalantly and even waving at the camera with a smile, while DJ seems a bit nervous. They eventually collide and are knocked off their boards into the water. Geoff then surfs along and waves at the camera.

_Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na NaNa NaNa Na Na!_

Faolan and Elisa are then shown crossing a crosswalk together in a city, and then ducking to avoid getting hit by the Jumbo Jet, with Faolan on top of Elisa as he covers her.

The camera then cuts to the top of the plane, where all the contestants are arranged in a human pyramid. Then, the plane is shown flying through several locations, such as Paris, London, and Australia.

_I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous_

The camera cuts back to the top of the plane, where contestants (still in a human pyramid) are singing the lyrics of the theme song and dancing, with the camera cutting to Owen at the top with Izzy on his shoulder, then Courtney and Heather glaring at each other, then DJ at the bottom right corner, who gets hit in the face by a seagull.

_I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be famous_

Then, in the cockpit, an annoyed Chef turns the plane sharply, causing all of the contestants to fall off. While most of them use parachutes (except Cody, who is being held by Susan) and land safely, Tyler falls flat on the ground, while Courtney and DJ land on their rears, with the former looking slightly upset and the latter scared and holding his head. The plane pulls up behind the group, with the season's logo on a piece of metal on the side. As it stops, the piece of metal shifts and slightly falls out of place. Ezekiel then falls flat on his face in front of the group, visibly shocking Noah and Lindsay, and then the theme song ends.

(_Whistling: I wanna be, I wanna be famous_)

* * *

><p>Last we saw from our heroes, the three teams were standing in the desert, just behind the finish line, with two team having their respective animals to mount.<p>

"Wooo, look! Team colors!" Izzy exclaimed as she pointed at her team's mat.

"Why the heck is our mat yellow?" Harold asked indignant "We're not cowards!"

"Harold, this is Egypt, not China, so there's no use in symbolism." Leo said.

"And besides, the yellow in China actually represents completeness and wealth, according to the Five Element Theory" Faolan explained. "You, of all people, should know by now that the yellow in China is in allusion to the Yellow Emperor Huang Di"

"Yeah, relax sugar. That mat's gold 'cause Team Victory's in first place!" LeShawna said confidently-

"You've said it sista!" Nikita replied as she high-fived LeShawna.

"That's right, Leshie!" Jasmine exclaimed, making LeShawna cringe.

Back with Team Amazon, all nine members were getting settled on their camel: Heather on the neck, Gwen and Susan on each of the humps, Charlie and Ezekiel in between the humps, and Cody holding up the rear end. The only ones not settled are Eva, Sadie and Elisa.

"I can't believe Duncan got disqualified just because he won't sing." Gwen said.

"Maybe he _can't_ sing." Heather snarked while smirking.

* * *

><p>The scene changes to Duncan sitting in the first class lounge. He was taking a drink while sitting in one of the comfy chairs and was humming <em>It's Flying Time<em>. He may have gotten himself on the chopping line, but singing on national television was something he refused to do and swore to never do, even for a trillion bucks. Because, after all, he still wanted to keep his dignity intact. Suddenly, the door opened to reveal Sarousch, who made confused faces at the punk.

"Were you just-?"

"No"

"Because it sounded like you were..."

"But I wasn't, and I never will"

Sarousch points at his own eyes with two fingers, then points at Duncan, before walking away. Duncan then resumed to drinking his refreshment.

* * *

><p>Back with Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool...<p>

"I'm SO glad that you and Linds can be with your boyfriends! You're like, so cute!" Katie cooed, but didn't notice Tyler looking depressed.

"Owen's magic! When he breaths his nose whistles the nation anthem." Izzy said.

We cut to Owen doing just that without using his hands. Team Victory looked at him strangely.

"I can also do that, in fact, in my audition i used my nose to sing the Yankee Doodle anthem" Bridgette added.

"Really? Can you do it Bridge?" Geoff asked.

"Okay, if you insist" Bridgette put both of her index fingers on her nose and began nose-whistling Yankee Doodle. Some of her teammates clapped at that.

"That was awesome babe!"

"Yes Bridgette, that's delightful" Albert complimented, which made Bridgette blush and Geoff mad.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Albert:** Look, i needed to compliment her so she wouldn't suspect that i actually hate that song. Why? Because it was the anthem that those filthy Americans used during the Bunker Hill Battle, not to mention they have the gull to destroy my people's proud empire. The German regime will not be in vain.

* * *

><p>A pair of cymbals interrupted their conversation when Chef claps them together as Sarousch had sat on the intern's back, who was struggling from how much balance he didn't have. The host was munching a handful of grapes while another intern was waving a big leaf to give him some breeze.<p>

"You have no idea of how much i adore Egypt. And I'm going love it even more when you complete you second challenge. I call this challenge, The Amazing Camel Race!"

"Where are the other camels?" Harold asked while the camera shifted to the stinky camel.

"There are no other camels." the host responded "It's a _camel_ race not a _camels_ race"

"Yes" Heather exclaimed in triumph.

"What?" Both Leo and Albert exclaimed in outrage while the goat bleated angrily.

"We WON last time!" LeShawna exclaimed angrily while glaring at the host "But the girls get a camel [Cody, Charlie, Ezekiel: HEY!"], the boys get a goat [Lindsay, Courtney, Katie, Izzy: HEY!], and WE get a STICK?"

"Each reward has its advantages. Trust me. You'll be racing to the world's most infamous waterways, The Nile! Each team must bring their rewards all the way to the finish. You have 1 minute to strategize" Sarousch informed.

Heather had already gotten on the camel, waiting for everybody else to get on it.

"It won't budge," Susan said.

"Move it, people. This is a race." Heather said snappy.

"Uh, hello? It's "_Team_ Amazon." Not "_Dictatorship_ Amazon!"" Elisa reminded Heather in an annoyed way.

"Great" the queen bee grumbled "Well, i'll stop being bossy when you start doing things right!"

Cody, although stationed at the rear, got down and went up to Susan's side of the camel.

"Hey..." Cody said as he got up the camel and faced Susan (well, more like staring at her cleavage) "fancy meeting you here. You're up for a slushie later?"

"Oh gosh Cody. You have no idea of how long i've waited for this." Susan cooed "I've always dreamed of this moment... except you weren't wearing a shirt"

"Yeah, I'm available." Cody chuckled.

"You hear that? That's the sound of girls all over the world, running and rushing just desperate to... lock their doors!" Heather sarcastically remarked at the expense of Cody.

"Heather, show him some respect! You will never be a successful humanitarian if you keep treating people like you're on top of the social hierarchy" Elisa said with a scolding finger.

"Well, sorry to tell you hon, but that's how society works. Deal with it"

"Oh, i'll help YOU deal with it if you don't hurry this beast up!" Eva hollored, scaring Heather before going up to the camel.

"Don't listen to her, Cody. She's just jealous that you have the most fangirls on the show, me included." Susan assured while caressing the tech-geek's face like a baby. Cody chuckled as he felt her soft hand against his skin.

"Anything for you and the ladies. I was born to be humiliated!"

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, on Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool, Albert decides that, since he is in a team full of incompetent buffoons (in his opinion, anyway), he decides to encourage them by giving a long-famous speech.<p>

"We need no camel! We have each other! And we are unstoppable! I have, myself, full confidence that if all do their duty, if nothing is neglected, we shall prove ourselves once more able to defend our grace and decency, to ride out the storm of war, and to outlive the menace of defeat, if necessary alone. Linked together in our cause and in their need, we will defend to the death our integrity, aiding each other like good comrades to the utmost of their strength. We shall go on to the end. We shall fight on the rivers, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our team honor no matter the cost. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender. We have the will, and the strenght, and together we will triumph!"

His whole team, their spirits risen, began cheering for his speech, with the girls squealing and the boys gushing approvingly. But, from the corner of his eye, Leo eyed the German boy suspiciously and noted that something was very wrong.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Leo**: Something fishy is going on in here, and it has something to do with that guy. Now i know that i shouldn't judge him this early in the contest, it's just... when i heard him give that speech, i realized something that was seriously wrong. That speech was spoken by Winston Churchill in the Parliament of the United Kingdom on 1940. And here, it was used by a German! Why would someone hailing from the most despicable people in human history use a speech borrowed, no, more like outright **stolen** from one of their worst enemies in WWII? I'm going to have to give him a closer look.

**Bridgette**: (nervous) Okay, I know it maybe looks bad, but I want you all to know that I was NOT swooning over Albert. It was just the heat! Geoff, I just want to run my fingers through your thick, dark... (she suddenly realized what she was saying) Blonde! Blonde hair.

* * *

><p>Over in Team Victory's area, Harold is playing with their stick by using it as a jousting weapon while making kung fu poses. This was much to the annoyance of Faolan.<p>

"On the bright side i can use this stick to defend us from deadly sand snakes. They could be anywhere!"

Unfortunately, that little comment was a very stupid move on Harold's part, as the girls squealed in terror while looking everywhere to make sure there isn't any snakes.

"No way!" LeShawna exclaimed as she jumped on Harold's arms in an attempt to get away from the snakes (which there weren't for now). Sadly, this proved too much for Harold to handle, as his frail physique prevents him from holding LeShawna much longer.

"Fear not, my luscious beauty. I will protect you!"

"Be careful with that, Harold!" Leo warned, snatching the pointy object from his comrade's hand "This is not meant to be used as some toy!"

"And next time, don't say anything that could creep us out!" Jasmine screamed angrily at the nerd.

On Team Sarousch, Albert is instructing his team.

"Okay girls, up, up!"

Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool are sitting on the goat, with Courtney on Noah's shoulders and Owen on top of Tyler's, while Lindsay was standing on Owen's head, and Katie was sitting on Trent's shoulders, who was hanging from Courtney's arm, while Noah had the dismay to hold the hand of Justin, his anti-Me. Finally, Izzy was hanging in between Courtney and Owen, horribly outbalancing the weight on the goat.

"This is so cool, Albert!" Owen exclaimed "Hey, do you mind if i call you Al? Go _Al_!

Owen failed to notice Albert was scowling at being called that.

"Yeah, _this_ is gonna work." Noah sarcastically assumed.

"Have faith, Noah. Believe. In us!" Albert encouraged.

"You heard him, Noah. Have faith!" Courtney concurred. Just as she said that, Albert made a gymnastic maneuver in the air, then jumped on top of Owen and Courtney, and easily evens out the instability with his own body.

"Whoa! We're perfectly balanced!" Tyler exclaimed at the results.

"Okay, Color me impressed." Noah remarked again.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Albert:** It's basic weight distribution. Anyone with a degree in engineering or an IQ of 173 or higher could figure it out. _(to Chef Hatchet)_ By the way, you're doing a magnificent job flying this plane.

**Chef:** Who, me? Nah.

**Albert:** Now, now. Don't blush, it's true.

**Chef** (giggles deeply)

* * *

><p>"Attention children!" Sarousch announced to make everyone look at him "The Nile is over there. Somewhat big, blue, watery, and really noticeable. You can't miss it. Or i suppose you can, then you die. You could probably yourselves eaten alive by the local scarab beetles. It's mating season, and they get all 'killy' when exposed to the heat"<p>

Leshawna smiled, "I am glad they aren't out here. Those things are nasty!"

"I'll tell them you said so!"

Sarousch snapped his fingers, to which Chef then toppled down an ancient vase and released many scarab beetles, on the path to reaching the other contestants. The intern gasped in terror as the little critters approached him. This made LeShawna scream and go back to her team, and by now, the scarabs had everyone surrounded, inciting screams of terror. Sarousch just looked in amusement, since he knew that laughing openly on national television would make him look immature like Chris. And he wouldn't allow his image to be tainted by such a juvenile antic. At that point, the bell chimes again.

"Oh, it's time for a song! Think of it as a mini-challenge. Music can soothe the savage, heat-seeking scarabs, so create a good song and make sure they don't kill you. Or don't, and you get disqualified like Duncan"

This made everyone groan in exasperation, but Trent took it as his cue and, pulling his ever faithfull guitar, began playing a peaceful guitar solo. Soon Cody, Noah, Tyler, DJ and Albert lined up as they began singing.

**Albert:** _No need to get crazy. It's lovin' time at last!_

**Cody, Noah, Tyler, DJ, and Albert:** _You don't wanna eat us up._

**Owen:** _We're mostly full of gas. No, no!_

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _It's mating time for scarabs._

**Leshawna:** _So, what'cha waiting on?_

**Izzy:** _Just ignore us humans!_

**Cody:** _Oooooh._

**All:** _And make out till the break of dawn!_

**Trent ****and Cody:** _It's lovin' time._

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**Albert:** _Scarab mating season._

**Trent, Leo and Cody:** _It's lovin' time_

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**Faolan:** _ Scarabs, get busy now..._

**Harold:** _ It's lovin' time. _

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**All:** _Scarab mating season. _

**Cody:** _It's lovin' time._

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**All (except Ezekiel):** _Scarab mating season!_

**Ezekiel:** _Mating_ _seasonal, eh? Hit it!  
><em>

_(Guitar solo)  
><em>

**Bridgette:** _Make out as if you're in love. It's lovin' time at last!_

**Noah, DJ and Harold:** _We're out of the menu, boys!_

**Geoff:** _And make your party a big blast!_

**Trent and Cody:** _Make love with pure joy!_

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _It's mating time for scarabs._

**Nikita:**_ So, what'cha waiting on?_

**Susan:** _Just ignore us, humans!_

**All:** _And make out till the break of dawn!_

**Trent ****and Cody:** _It's lovin' time._

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**Elisa:** _Scarab mating season._

**Faolan, Leo and Charlie:** _It's lovin' time_

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**Justin:** _ Scarabs, get busy now..._

**Harold:** _ It's lovin' time. _

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**All:** _Scarab mating season. _

**Tyler:** _It's lovin' time._

**Gwen, Courtney, and Heather:** _Lovin' time, lovin' time..._

**All (except Ezekiel):** _Scarab mating season!_

**Ezekiel:** _Mating season, yo!_

Sadly, this off tune lyric made the scarabs snap out of their love trance and turned to the contestants.

"Ezekiel, no!" Albert exclaimed in desperation "What are you doing! You've doomed us all!"

The scarabs crawled towards the contestants. Everyone began running for their lives while the putrid insects chased them.

"Excellent, now go!" Sarousch exclaimed, he blew the air horn after just a couple of seconds, making everybody run for the Nile. Everyone takes off for the challenge with Team Sarousch Is Really Really Really Really Cool on goat in the lead, Team Amazon on camel in second and Team Victory on foot in third.

* * *

><p>Thirty minutes into the challenge, Team Amazon's camel was still trekking through the desert, starting to tire itself out.<p>

"Pstt, Camel. C'mon, camel! Faster! C'mon Camel!" Elisa said trying to make the camel move faster, but without success.

Heather looked at the humanitarian, "That is NOT how you talk to a camel. Watch this," she said before clearing her throat "FREAKING MOVE IT!" She screamed at the camel, thinking it'd be better than what Elisa said.

Gwen just rolled her eyes, not sure whose side she should be on. What she was more concerned of, however, was Cody, who was hanging behind her and making desperate attempts to grab her ankles. "So, how's it going back there?" she asked.

"Yeah, need anything, man?" Charlie asked.

Cody frowned, shaking his head, before the camel's tail slapped his face, which happened as he spoke.

Ow! Great! Thanks for (Dah!) asking! As long as this camel doesn't (Augh!) go Number Three!"

Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool caught up to the all girl (and three boys) team.

"Who's gonna win the race now!" Heather said while waving tauntingly at the opposing team "See ya!" she added before blowing a raspberry.

"Eat sand, losers!" Eva hollored.

"Such witty remarks from such fiercely intelligent women. I'm both humbled and intrigued." Albert said while smirking suavily (is that even a word?)

"Don't waste your time on that garbage, skinny" Eva remarked "I'm not buying it"

"Oh really? Not even if i might add the fact that your muscles reach a fine peak in human perfection?

"I... wait, what?"

"I'm complimenting your strenght, after all every woman needs a strong role model, and i couldn't think of anyone else but you who could fit the role perfectly"

"You really think so?" the musclebound amazon said with a small smile, but quickly shook her head. "No, i can't look weak in front of the enemy! Come on Eva, concentrate. Will someone hurry this camel up?"

Heather looked at the german boy, who simply winked at her. She snarled.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Heather:** Oh, he's good. Really good. Seriously, what is his deal? He's just so... perfect! Ugh!

* * *

><p>"Can it see The Nile, Elisa?" Gwen asked.<p>

"It's got to be around here!" Elisa replied.

"Too bad Sarousch didn't give us a map or even a compass, it would've made it easier" Cody complained. Most of the teenagers were horrified at the thought of going across the desert with no map or water. And Cody was one of them.

"But Sarousch said that we need to use our instinct, right?" Charlie added.

While the conversartion went up, Albert looked at a side, and suddenly, his eyes went wide. He eyed at a sight of blue, that looked like a stream. It's the Nile River.

"Hold on everyone, i'll change our route!"

As Albert swifted his hips from one side to the other, the goat guided them to the next part of the challenge. As soon as they were gone, Cody noticed something.

"Hey, where are they?"

The whole Team Amazon then noted that Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool was gone.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Albert:** Perhaps it would have been kind to show the girl's team which way to go... but you've seen my team. We need all the help we can get. I'm stuck with a know-it-all weakling, a human fart machine, a sentimental musician, a pathetic excuse of an athlete, a shallow male model, a temperamental girl with a bossy attitude, a hollow-minded vixen who could well be a mistress to the Aryans, a female psychopath and Katie. But that doesn't mean i have to put up with them. Just you wait.

* * *

><p>"Uh guys, the other team is gone! We're all alone here!" Gwen announced.<p>

"Does anyone know where we are?" Susan asked.

"According to this map, we're just, like, three hours away from The Nile" Charlie said as he looked at a map. The girls, and Cody and Ezekiel, looked baffled. He pointed out something in the map "See? We're right here, and The Nile is that away."

"Since when do you have a map, new boy?" Eva asked. Charlie shrugged.

"My parents gave it to me as a present. They don't want me to get lost"

"We could've used that map an hour ago, and yet you didn't even TELL US ABOUT IT?" Heather hollored at the newcomer, who winced at the sound of her voice.

"Sorry, sorry, it's just i thought Sarousch would disqualify us if we cheated"

"Like he's even going to care about that" Gwen scoffed "Chris didn't"

"Are we anywhere near the Nile or not?" Heather asked impatiently.

"Well, if you want a straight answer... i'm afraid not" Charlie meekly responded.

"WE'RE LOST!" the entire team screamed.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, with Team Victory...<p>

"Come on, soldiers! MOVE! Hop, hop, hop, hop." Leo hollored.

"Ugh, this is SOOOO not what i saw in the application form!" Nikita whined as she panted.

"We're so far behind we can't see the others anymore!" Geoff reminded.

"Didn't we pass...(pant)... that cactus leg (pant) ten minutes ago?" Bridgette asked.

LeShawna then skidded to a stop. "We've been running in circles!"

"In circles?" Leo exclaimed. "That means we're lost!"

At the Nile, Sarousch was anxiously waiting for the first team to arrive. After waiting for almost an hour, he heard the bleat of a goat, looked over, and saw his namesake team arriving at the river.

"That's the finish line! Owen exclaimed

"Yeah, on the other side! Noah added in annoyance.

"Be welcome to the third part of the Egyptian challenge!" Sarousch announced from the other side.

Owen tried getting what Sarousch had just said, but it was too distant, "WHAAAT? SPEAK UP!"

All he heard was Sarousch talking gibberish, then turned to his teammates.

"Did you guys get any of that?" Owen shrugged. Sarousch, very annoyed with anger, snapped his fingers and signaled at Chef, who gave him a very big megaphone.

"I SAID WELCOME TO THE THIRD AND FINAL EGYPTIAN CHALLENGE, YOU DUPE!"

The force of the voice was so powerful that the contestants felt wind and sound waves blowing their hair back.

"Weave a basket boat out of reeds. Your basket has to be big enough to hold your whole team, including your reward of the last challenge, which means Goat-face over there!"

"Hey!" Tyler exclaimed offended.

"I think he meant the goat" Albert corrected while jerking his thumb towards the mammal.

"Oh cool. Ha, thanks!"

"AND YOU'RE GOING TO USE THE BASKET TOGETHER WITH THOSE OARS TO ROW YOURSELVES ACROSS THE FINISH LINE! The first team across flies to first class to our next destination."

Team Victory...

As the ten contestants were running into the desert, they were breathless, but still managed to find a way.

"From first place to last! This thing is useless!" Leo said, angrily snapping the stick in half, then throwing it away. A few seconds later, however, the stick seemingly came to life, as it began to shake. Harold then took the object in his hands.

"Hey, it's a diving rod!" the geek exclaimed.

"But we don't want to get struck by lightning" Geoff said.

"No genius, it's a _diving_ rod. Not a _lightning_ rod. It helps you find water" Faolan informed.

"Sarousch did say the reward had its advantages." DJ added "That stick could lead us right into The Nile!"

"According to some experts, if you direct a stick towards a certain location with water, it can work like a diving rod." Harold informed.

"Or, in a military aspect, a compass" Leo concluded with a knowing smirk.

He held it out, and nine grins started as the stick began to move until it was pointing at a specific direction. They all began running.

"According to the stick, it's telling us to go right," Harold said.

"This way! And I don't think it's a mirage!" Beth said while pointing at the location.

"I see it too!" That was what LeShawna said. The whole team arrived and began cheering, but they were interrupted by someone's voice.

"Hello there" Albert's voice was heard. The whole team turned to see Team Sarousch Really, Really, Really, Really Cool, who were picking up some reeds and began building a boat large enough for ten persons and one goat.

"How did you get in here so quickly?" LeShawna asked.

"Lovely weather we're having, aren't we?" he asked in a mocking tone. "This could be a simple matter of efficiency since i have such a proud, confident team of winners. Oh, and in case you needed to know, we need to make a boat on our own and cross the river with our item."

"Thanks for that bit of information" Leo said before glaring "but we don't need _your_ help. We don't ally ourselves with the enemy"

"And what about your teammates? At one point they will be your enemies too."

"Maybe, but not today" the soldier reclaimed. He turned to his team "Now, everyone to work! Pronto!"

Meanwhile, Team Amazon was in a neverending argument about which direction to take, and you couldn't really tell what they were saying between Heather's barking, Eva's growls and Sadie's wailing. Only the boys were quiet and for good reason; if they made a comment at the expense of the girls (especially by comparing them with banshees), they would only end up in a hospital, not to mention remain alone for the rest of their lives. Ezekiel especially learned it the HARD way.

When Team Amazon finally made it to the Nile, Heather was already not pleased with what they had to do. She was even less pleased when they saw Team Victory and Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool, and what they were making. Geoff, DJ and Harold were building their basket boat with all the reeds they could find. Faolan had several bundles of wooden arrows tied together by some reeds, quite a few arrows not tied, nine bows.

"Basket-weave a boat! Aaaagh!"

"Ha! Who's happy to have just one stick now?" DJ asked the girls tauntingly as they were building a battle ship sized boat, with a small room included.

"Sorry you guys are so far behind. Our baskets are nearly done already thanks to my speed weaving." Leo boasted.

"Ugh, he's more arrogant than Harold!" Heather snarled.

"Hey!" the nerd wheezed indignant.

"Luckily, since my father is a Navy admiral and the chief of Naval Operations of Canada, and he taught me how to build normal scale battle ships, this should be piece of cake." Leo told his team as they were working.

"Your father works in the Navy?" Harold asked.

"Yes, he is tough as steel, but is otherwise a very decent guy." Leo took a random arrow lying around before turning to Faolan, who was still building arrows. "And you're making weapons for our ship? We don't need any." He guestured at his team to continue working.

"Why not?"

"Because, there are no crocodiles in here" Leo said as if he was stating the obvious.

"But crocodiles live in The Nile" Harold said.

"Well, if you get a closer look, you'll see that there are no crocodiles here. In fact, i can't see any of those."

"THAT IS BECAUSE THERE WON'T BE ANY CROCODILES ON THIS CHALLENGE!" Sarousch said through the megaphone "Rather, i have a more subtle surprise for you"

The contestants winced at what Sarousch may be referring to as 'surprise'.

"How are we supposed to build a boat with so little time?" Heather asked in desperation.

"Maybe i could be of assistance, gals" Susan suggested.

"Wait, you know how to basket weave?" Elisa asked.

"Yeah I can weave our boat out of these reeds."

"How do you know?" Charlie asked.

"Because i took special classes while my school went to a field trip. They taught us how to basket weave straw hats and picnic baskets"

"And why did you take a class like that?" Sadie asked.

Susan suddenly looked nervous. She bit her lower lip while blushing. She sighed "Because i thought that would sway the boys away from staring at me, into making them think i was not special. Turns out i was wrong, because i always make the mistake of leaning my butt while i kneel."

"You were always looked at, even in activities for losers?" Heather asked with a hint of haughtiness, much to Cody and Ezekiel's annoyance.

"But the worst part is that some of the boys stare at my cleavage while i lean downwards. How embarrasing. That's why i joined this show, to prove to everyone that i'm MORE than just a pretty face. But when i signed up, having the role of 'Miss Fanservice' wasn't what i had in mind."

"It's obvious the boys here and the viewers are pigs" Eva remarked, which upset Cody, Charlie and Ezekiel, but they chose not to argue back, fearing Eva's wrath (as well as the whole team's wrath).

"Typical of this show" Gwen muttered "That's something i'd expect from Chris, but from a businessman like Sarousch? He's supposed to be defending teenage decency in case girls are viewed as sexual objects"

"Gwen, you of all people should know that there is no such thing as logic in a show this immature" Charlie said. "That man, like everyone else, is under contract"

"He's right Gwen," Cody added "We have to follow our contracts or else face lawsuits for not following the producers' orders"

"Man, i should've never signed up for this show"

"Less talking, more working!" Heather immediately ordered.

"Don't worry guys, i got this covered" Susan said as she cracked her knuckles and began to build their boat.

"Eva, i need you to help me build some sections of the boat with me"

"I have something else in mind" Eva said deviously as she turned to the palm trees and, out of nowhere, pulled an axe.

"Where did you get that ax, Eva?" Cody asked fearfully.

"Izzy gave it to me. Girl's crazy, but very useful. Now everyone step behind, this is gonna be pretty!"

Then Eva began chopping the tree, and for every whack she gave, a coconut fell from it, eventually getting Team Amazon buried in coconuts. The members of Team Amazon resurfaced from the fruit pile, and looked back at the scene on their newly made boat of reeds. Despite only being made by one person, it was decently sized and even had a small room in the middle. Alongside it was what appeared to be a large, wooden spoon shape divice, somewhat like a mini catapult. Eva in question was moving a huge boulder over to her arsenal. Susan wiped the sweat out of her forehead, while some sweat beads went down her breasts (much to Cody's enlightment). Eva managed to chop down the palm tree and cracked her knuckles.

"Piece of cake" she casually rebuffed.

"Okay, it took a while, I admit, but I had to make it strong enough for nine people and a camel." Susan said while panting. "All on board"

Everyone in the team stepped into the boat. Miraculously for them, it stayed afloat.

"Wow, you two are amazing" Sadie complimented.

"Maybe you should think about listening a bit more to me this time around" Heather said in all confidence. This made her whole team burst into laughing. Albert watched from not so afar.

"Don't give up! Besides, we have a skilled basket weaver on our team. We still have a shot at this!" Albert reassured them.

"Al's right! Thanks Al" Owen said while helping his team build the basket.

Albert began shivering at the mention of that name.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<br>**

**Albert:** I have no problem being called... Al. _(shudders)_ Uh, that wasn't... it's just... chilly... in here. _(shudders again, wraps his arms around himself, then looks around)_

* * *

><p>Now Team Amazon didn't have to worry about building the boat. They did, however, have to worry about bringing their camel on. Cody, Charlie and Ezekiel tried pushing the animal in while Charlie pulled.<p>

"Come on, pal!" Charlie said while pulling the camel's neck with a rope "Ugh, get into the boat"

"This thing is more stubborn than a mule!" Ezekiel said while grunting.

"Stubborn and lazy!" Cody added. He tried to push harder, but that was a mistake, as the camel groaned and went number three. Cut to the females who looked in disgust as Cody's moans are heard.

"Cody!" Susan screamed.

"Fine, we'll do it ourselves. Come on!" Gwen declared as they went up to the camel. Heather walked over to Gwen with a stern look on her face.

"You're not the leader Weird Goth Girl, at best, you are a troublemaker"

"Zip it, Bitch! You want to win this or what?" Eva demanded.

"Well, i want to win first class, of course"

"Then i suggest you stop complaining and start to actually DO something" Elisa said as the girls tried pulling the camel onwards while Cody, whose face was covered in 'camel chocolate', collapsed to the ground.

Elsewhere, Team Victory and Team Sarousch Is Really Really Really Really Cool have finished their boats and were ready to set sail with their more weightless rewards. The ships, like Faolan's arrow bundles, were made out of the remaining wood and tied together with reeds. They about the size of Team Amazon's (if not a little bigger), but Team Sarousch Is Really Cool's (4x) did not have a room in the middle. There was also a small ramp that led up to it.

"To the water!" Albert commanded.

"It works! Awesome!" Owen laughed joyfully as Albert whistled for the goat to come. The mammal ran to to the German and hopped on his arms. As for Team Amazon, they were still trying to make the camel cooperate, but not even Eva's strenght was capable of lifting the quadrupedal beast.

"This is totally unfair! If it wasn't for that stupid slob, we'd be paddling across The Nile by now!" Heather screamed in frustration, which was loud enough for Albert to eavesadrop.

"We're going to win fair and square" Albert said "But to make sure you believe that, talk to the camel Izzy"

"Albert, are you crazy? Izzy's on OUR team, not theirs" Noah commented as he viewed the tall teen suspiciously.

"Noah's right, why should we help the enemy?" Courtney questioned.

"Because an unfair victory is not much worth. Now Izzy"

"Okay" the crazy girl then began making camel speech, which soon made the mammal comply and walk forwards to Team Amazon's boat. Soon, the three teams began their race by rowing.

"You know, Chef, I think this challenge is too simple for them." Sarousch told his employee.

"I believe so." he replied. With a whistle, the host called out, holding up the control remote "You want to know what _this_ does?"

Several of the contestants balked when they saw Sarousch raise his finger towards the button.

"No, Sarousch, don't do it!"

"Please, i beg of you!"

"Have mercy, man!"

"MOOOOOMMMMMMAAAAAA!"

Too late. He pressed the button. Suddenly, the unexpected happened. Instead of crocodiles resurfacing, what they heard was a BOOM! That made the boats lose balance, while everyone collided with each other.

Then it hi them. Sarousch put a mine field int he river!

"A mine field? Sarousch is insane!" Heather shrieked.

"Just the first episode, and we already know our new host is EVEN WORSE THAN CHRIS!" Noah hollored as he began fearing for his life.

"BETTER HURRY UP, BECAUSE ITS SUDDEN DEATH FROM HERE ON!" Sarousch announced.

"Quick Team Sarousch, for victory!" Albert declared as he and his teammates rowed faster.

Team Victory's boat noticed the boat speeding ahead of them. Leo looked at Albert on top of the hut on their boat, waving tauntingly at him while yawning. Leo snarled.

"After them!" Leo commanded. Their boat soon began following Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool's boat. Leo ordered his teammates to speed up and they complied, now both ships were neck to neck.

It was then that the teams heard a loud splash. They decided to have a look over to the source, just barley behind their boat. Team Victory could just see the first giant stone sinking in the water, and it seemed to have hit close enough to barley graze a small section of their boat. Leo and Harold looked up and they saw Team Amazon was right behind Team Victory, and Eva was now lifting another one of the three giant stones on the catapult. Leo looked in despair about what would happen next, then he looked down the bows and packs of arrows Faolan made earlier. He took them and went to his teammates.

"Load all these bows up with arrows, and start firing at Team Amazon's ship!"

"But they have a catapult. We won't be able to beat that!" Geoff said.

"We don't have to fire AT them. Rather, _beneath_ them" Leo corrected about his strategy. It didn't take long for Bridgette to figure what he meant.

"What? But that would be crossing the line, Leo! They're gonna die if that happens" she exclaimed in panic.

"They're not going to die and we don't have to kill them. We just need to keep them busy"

Luckily for Team Victory, Faolan and Harold had a perfect aim with arrows, but the thing is, Eva was on the point of Team Amazon's boat, using her wrists to block out the arrows like some Xiaolin monk. Then Faolan decided to follow Leo's tactic and shot a stone-pointed arrow at the river, right behind the opposite team's boat.

"Ha, you aim is lousy, pretty boy" Eva boasted.

"Wasn't pointing at you, sweetheart" the pretty boy replied. Down below, the arrow shot was slowly going down to a bomb which, upon a minimal contact, made a BOOM! It then occured to Team Amazon that the arrows were shot into the bombs, making them explode. Team Amazon's boat began shaking while the big waves allowed Team Victory to go forwards.

Heather was the first to recover and, upon opening her eyes, she looked scared when she looked over at the other boat. The bows had _packs_ of arrows now.

"FIRE!" Leo commanded.

Suddenly, the packs of arrows slid out of their reeds after being launched, and soon after there was a huge mass of the projectiles heading right at the boat.

"Another arrow storm. Really?" Was all Gwen could say before Team Amazon had a much bigger barage to deal with. The team quickly moved behind the camel for protection. Albert saw this from his team's boat and used the chance to go ahead.

"Come on team! While they're distracted, we get to the finish line!"

"Aye, captain!" Owen exclaimed before he and his teammates began rowing faster. Leo noticed this.

"Don't let them get away!" Leo commanded. Team Victory reached up to Team Sarousch Is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool again.

"They're following us!" Trent exclaimed.

"What do you have in mind, oh glorious leader?" Noah snarkily said in one of the absolute worst times.

"We need a distraction" Albert suggested.

"Like what?" Katie asked.

"Izzy, stand on the other end of the boat, while Trent, Tyler and I set up this" he said as he pulled what appeared to be a rather large elastic waistband.

"What's that?" Tyler asked.

"The key to our victory" Albert replied as he, the musician and the sporto prepared the waistband. Izy came forwards and positioned herself in the middle.

"On my signal, one... two... THREE, FIRE!"

They released the waistband, which propelled the girl so fast it looked like she was fired out of a canon. Izzy flew over to the other ship and, making a few pirouettes like a ninja, she jumped on the boat's hut.

"Tally hoo, tally hoo, bet you can't catch me, fools!" she cackled as she pulled something out of her skirt. It was a set of small bombs.

"Quick, disarm her before she blows us all to Heavens!" Leo ordered. DJ and Geoff tried to catch on the crazy girl, but she was too quick for them. While running, she threw the bombs at her persecutors, and they made tiny explosions, which managed to scare the gentle giant and the party dude. She blew a raspberry at them while climbing back to the hut, and shook her butt at them. She then heard someone clearing his throat, so she looked up to see Harold giving her a death glare while holding his num-chuks.

"Prepare to be defeated, redheaded demon!" he declared while making a pose "Get out of this boat and you shall be spared. Refuse and prepare to be destroyed!"

"Surrender? To a mortal?" she cackled before scoffing "Destruction it is"

We get a close up of her eyes narrowing in a threatening manner, like in the kung fu movies.

_"Oh crap, she's not serious"_ Bridgette thought fearfully. She was concerned about what Izzy may had in that wicked mind of hers. Most at all, she was concerned about what could happen to Harold. Izzy pulled a pocket knife out of her cleavage (don't ask how) and got it close to her face. She licked the not pointy part of the blade without getting her tongue sliced and pointed it in Harold's direction. They charge up to each other.

They begin fighting. Izzy tries to slash Harold but he evades and he tries to knock Izzy, who also dodges, they continue to fight and clash knife with num-chuks. Izzy manages to get the upper hand and starts to pummel Harold.

"Someboy do something!" Bridgette screamed.

"Crazy girl ain't killin' my man!" LeShawna hollored as she went up to the lunatic redhead and prepared to pummel her. Unfortunately, Izzy turned around and began fighting LeShawna while holding Harold in a head lock.

"Continue to row, my comrades" Albert shouted "We're close to victory"

It was then that they heard another loud splash. They decided to have another look over to the source, just barley behind their boat. Team Sarousch is Really, Really, Really, Really Cool turned around and saw Team Amazon using the catapult.

"How are we going to beat that?" Courtney questioned. Albert looked around, hoping to find something useful for this. His then then fell on the solution: Justin.

"Justin, comrade, go onto the other end of the boad and await my signal! I have an idea"

"What is it?"

"Just go and at my signal, you rip off your shirt"

Justin instantly got the memo and went to the other end.

"On my signal" Albert instructed while Eva lifted the second to last boulder. "One,"

Eva placed the boulder on the catapult.

"Two,"

Eva and Elisa prepared to launch the boulder.

"Three, NOW!"

Justin then ripped his green shirt off, revealing his God-like, perfect abs and muscles. They were shining thanks to Egypt's sun.

Immediately, this got the desired result. All the girls in Team Amazon became enamored with this hunk's manly sculpture. Eva became a drooling fool, while Elisa and Susan tried their hardest to think with logic and not with their vaginas. And failing miserably. Even the girls in Team Victory became distracted and lost focus.

"So handsome!" Jasmine cooed.

"Hmm, Hmm hmm hm," Nikita nodded

"Man, i want a piece of that hunk meat" LeShawna exclaimed.

"Must resist, remain loyal" Bridgette said nervously as she stared at the gorgeous man. She tried to avert her eyes, but failing. She swooned and looked up at the sky dreamily. She muttered a quick _'Please forgive me, Geoff'_.

"Must. Not. Give up. My. Principles" Elisa said while struggling not to look "But. It's. So. Difficult"

"I have Cody, I have Cody, I have Cody!" Susan repeated over and over again, then resorted to slapping herself to not give into temptation. Eva was so awestruck at the male hunk that she didn't notice that she accidentally pulled the lever down, releasing the huge rock anyways.

Albert saw the rock coming to him, eyes widened.

"Quick! Evasive maneuvers! Turn to the right!"

Unfortunately for the German teen, the girls on his team were also hypnotized by the piece of hunk meat that was Justin. Even Owen fell for his charms. Albert slapped his face in frustration and went to his remaining teammates.

"Tyler, Trent, Noah, we need to put more effort and ROW!"

Team Sarousch Is Really Cool (4x) complied and tried to turn to the right, but to no avail. The boulder splashed behind the boat and then, another bomb exploded, making the boat go forwards with the waves. On the other hand, Team Amazon was pushed away by the waves. This made the girls instantly snap out of their trance. Heather was the first to notice that they were behind.

"We need to reach them now!" Heather exclaimed as she went forwards the catapult "Give me that! I'm going to sink the damn boat!"

"Are you insane?" Gwen asked as she tried to push Heather away from the lever "You're going to get us all killed!"

"Step away, Weird Goth Girl!" the queen bee snapped "I did not come across a long way in this damn desert in this stupid heat just to lose!"

They were struggling to take the lever away from the other, but sadly, this proved to be a mistake, because in the struggle, they turned the catapult to the opposite side and, in their carelessness, pulled the lever. The giant boulder was propelled to the other side of the river and sunk. It touched another bomb, which made the boat tremble and everyone held tightly to the sides. This made the catapult launch another boulder, which was sent flying very far into the air, land-crushing right into the entrance of the pyramid. Crashing into the entrance, the boulder rolled around in the hallways a la Indiana Jones, until it eventually hit an unexpected destination.

The excavating site where the miners were working.

The boulder came crashing in, which caught the attention of the workers. When it came down, some of them stepped out of the way, screaming and waving their hands. Soon, the boulder crashed down into one of the machines. It breaks upon impact with the ground. An explosion ensued.

Everyone began running, but the explosion bits caused the other machines to explode, and the inside of the caves began crumbling as well, eventually collapsing as some of the boulders fell on the unfortunate workers. The administrator, however, managed to escape and pulled his cellphone, frantically pushing numbers.

* * *

><p>Meanwhile, outside in The Nile, where Sarousch and Chef were sitting and waiting for the teenagers to finish, they were drinking beverages while the poor interns (including the skeleton) were being used as footstools. Suddenly, Sarousch's phone rang again, so he picked it and flipped it open.<p>

"This is Sarousch Luther speaking"

"MR. SAROUSCH! Thank goodness you're there! We have a BIG problem here!"

The host raised an eyebrow.

"Could you speak with a little more calmness and dignity please?" Sarousch said while shaking his head "What kind of problem are you talking about? And why are you screaming?"

"Because the base of operations is collapsing, WITH US INSIDE!"

Sarousch's eyes opened wide shot.

"How is it even possible?"

"I don't know, it's just that a big rock came out of nowhere and everything turned into chaos!"

Sarousch didn't like the sound of that, for he knew how it was possible now.

"And the remains i ordered you to extract?"

"If it's even possible, we may be able to-OH GOD!"

A crashing sound was heard from the other line, making Sarousch cringe. The line was cut off, then left a very long blip. Sarousch shook the cellphone.

"Corman? CORMAN? Are you there? Speak to me!"

"What's wrong, Sarousch?" Chef asked in boredom. Sarousch, fearing the cook may figure something out, decided to lie.

"Oh nothing, it's just a very urgent business that requires my presence, once this challenge is over"

Behind Team Amazon, another bomb exploded, this time right beneath the boat, which of course blew the thing up to Heavens, and launching the six girls, three boys and camel into the air. They all screamed as they plummeted and fell to the water. Luckily, they were near the shore and ran up with their reward (with Eva using her upper body strenght to carry the camel), crossing the finish line. All of them jumping out with loud cheers, they almost danced with delight. As Team Amazon calmed down a little as far as fights and glomping was concerned, Team Victory pulled up.

Team Victory and Team Sarousch is Really Cool (4x) came in later. LeShawna was soaking wet, and the humidity turned her hair into an afro, while the others were drying themselves up. Geoff too off his hat and wrinkled it hoping to get the water out. Bridgette twirled a broken paddle around and then threw it back in the river. Faolan was stretching and discarding a broken bow, and DJ was fretting, hoping no one would notice he lost the stick.

Team Sarousch is Really Cool (4x) managed to get off mostly unscathed. The girls were wringing their hair out, with Lindsay whining about how it will take her hours to get her hair done. The boys were slightly shaken by the experience.

"Congratulations! Not only are you alive, but you have won the first challenge of the season!" the host complimented. "Team Amazon takes the win, despite resorting to brutal tactis. And as long as you had your rewards, nobody is going to the elimination room!"

"Jerk" Trent shouted.

"Psycho" Leo growled.

"Maniac" Noah grumbled.

"Oh man, i think i lost our stick!" DJ admitted in panic, causing his team to be angry with him. He fretted, looking to the side, chuckling weakly. Then he swallowed hard.

"DJ, of all the incompetent, imbecilic-" Leo ranted.

"Wait, do you mean this stick?" Geoff asked as he pulled something from his hat. It was Team Victory's stick, waterlogged but still in one piece.

"Geoff, you have the stick safe!" Bridgette squealed as she hugged her boyfriend, tackling him to the ground. The two began making out as the other members sighed in relief.

"And Team Victory is safe! For now" Sarousch announced."Now everyone back to the plane"

The jet in question was now moved right to the other side of the river, saving the three teams from another long trek.

"None of you is going home. Duncan, on the other hand..."

* * *

><p>(Duncan, elimination room)<p>

Sarousch was next to the punk , who was scowling, arms crossed and pressed against his chest. Sarousch walked up to him and gave him a parachute.

"Last stop for non-competitors. Duncan, since you refused to adhere by your contract, i'm going to count your rennounce as elimination."

"Yeah, right. You're supposed to give me a ride home."

"Yes, but we're going the other way so..." suddenly, Sarousch gave the criminal a strong push "Have a nice landing punk, and good riddance!" he called out.

Duncan began screaming as he plummeted down below. He was so panicky and disoriented by Sarousch's action that he didn't have time to pull his parachute, least of all put it on. Duncan finally got his parachute open...but only to get it caught in a tree where he hung with a swarm of scarab beetles awaiting him below.

* * *

><p><strong>Airplane Bathroom<strong>

**Ezekiel:** Yes! For once i'm not voted off first again! Prepare to lose to _The Zeke_ losers! This year's winner is in the house!

**Albert**: Just watch me, Total Drama Nerds! These fools don't know or suspect anything from me. No one does. And I intend to keep it that way. Because, compared to me, Heather's a saint!

* * *

><p>Albert's confessional was being watched in the editing room, where Sarousch was sitting with some other technicians, then switches to the cockpit with Chef piloting and Sarousch in his pilot outfit. "Just look at this nice surprise. We finally have a real competitor! Where will our next destination take us, and-"<p>

Owen's screams are heard in the background, making Sarousch frown in annoyance "will Owen get over his fear of flying? Find out next time, on an all-new episode of Total... Drama... World Tour!"

Cut to outside the window, where Owen's face is pressed against the glass in terror.

* * *

><p>Later that night...<p>

Sarousch walked in the plane's hallways, making a beeline to his private quarters. Once he arrived to his door, the host looked sideways to make sure no one was following him. After confirming the coast was clear, Sarousch started pressing some numbers, writing 4377590, then placed his hand on the scanner and it started flashing green. He did the same with his right eye, which the scanner also flashed.

"Recognize 0.1, aka Sarousch Luther" a feminine recording said. The door slid open and the host entered. Moving fowards to his desk, Sarousch turned to his computer and pressed a button. Soon, a few screens came out of the ceilings and formed around the host in a circular way. The screens activated and presented white figures on them. These guys are known (at least by outside sources and conspiracy nuts) as The Light.

"Sarousch Luther, you require an audience with the Light?" the front screen, which was clearly showing the leader L-1, questioned in a deep, menacing voice not unlike Sarousch's own.

"Yes. Very sorry to disturb you at this late hour, but-"

"Just make your point." L-3 ordered.

"Of course." Sarousch complied somewhat sheepishly before clearing his throat "Well, we had a report about our excavation crew, who were supposed to be extracting the remains of the pharaoh Garan Set **(1)**, but unfortunately they seemed to have died under... unknown circumstances. But we were confirmed that the reason was because the pyramid they were in, and that was used for today's challenge of Total Drama World Tour, collapsed underneath, taking our crew along with the remains. It will take months, maybe even years to search for those remains."

"And the reason why it collapsed?" L-2 asked.

"Well, apparently the pyramid was destroyed from the inside out when the huge boulder thrown by Team Amazon clashed with the entrance and made its path of destruction."

"Such a pity. If not for those meddling teenagers, we would have gained access to Garan Set's secrets of power and immortality" L-4 said in a voice that was clearly femenine.

"Well, what should i do with the contestants once the show is over?" Sarousch asked. A momento of silence filled room as the others figures stared at the host intently, as if they were analyzing him. The silence continued until L-3 spoke.

"Clone them" L-3 suggested.

"The substitutes will serve the Light, and only the Light" L-1 said.

"And as for the originals?" Sarousch asked again.

"Dispose of them. Leave no trace."

Sarousch's frown slowly turned into a wicked grin, which was even wider than Chris' because it expanded to his cheeks..

* * *

><p>Yep, i'm using the Light as the bad guys, only these aren't the same Light from Young Justice. Instead, they are characters of mine whose organization has the same name. To prove that i'm not lying, here is their (assumed) voice actors:<p>

**Fred Tatasciore**: L-1

**Mark Hamill**: L-2

**Kevin Conroy**: L-3

**Kari Walhgren**: L-4

**Roger Craig Smith**: L-5

**David Warner**: L-6

L-7 is not determined.

L-8 isn't determined either.

So anyways, they will be revealed as the story progresses.

And yes, here is where i begin Albert and Leo's rivalty, which will be more developed in the next chapter and as the story goes.

Here is some spoilers for the next episode:

"Konichiwa, we will be landing shortly in Japan"

"I said, 'You look beautiful under the rising sun,

"No. You are NOT going to buy manga comics. This is a challenge, not a vacation."

"Oh God, that old cliché again!"

"Sarousch is even sicker than Chris. Seriously. Huge fake boobs?"

"It's not fair. This is the only place in Japan i wanted to visit. It's like, the paradise for all comic book geeks."

"It is them. Call the master"

"You, you, you go now! You eat too much you, you will put me out of business!"

"I hate to break it to you, but that's not what otaku means"

**(1)** Garan Set is a mummy EVO seen in one of Generator Rex's recent episodes. I'm not entirely using him as a plot arc, rather just one of a series of dominoes destined to fall as the story goes.

And yes, about the yellow representing wealth thing, i did some research on my own, i hope i put the right facts.


End file.
